I Will Die For You
by South Park Trekkie
Summary: After Kenny and Butters come out to the world, they must face the challenges ahead of them. But, when Butters is attacked one night, Kenny begins a manhunt for the man responsible. Sexual Content.
1. Chapter 1: The First Day Of School

The wind was bitter and rough, tearing the sweet essence of air and her virginity. The pond was frozen and giving off a soft blue light from the full moon above us. The trees bare witness to the horrific scene before us. As a small boy with blonde hair, tear-filled blue eyes, and a beaten scrawny body lay on the frozen ground. An innocent naive little boy caught by the pure evil of man, was drowning in fear. His eyes were open with barely a blink, and his lips moving making a barely audible sound. He was whispering to himself, "Please don't touch me, I'll be good. Please don't touch me, I'll be good..." Stan stood there in shock, not knowing what to do. I don't blame him I stood there in disbelief, trying to wake myself up. Then Kenny woke me up with a frightful face, screaming at us, "What happened?!" Kenny sprinted towards Butters trying to steady his balance on the ice coated path. "Butters, Butters what happened!?" Butters slowly lifted his head up to Kenny and started to cry even more. Not once did he stop whispering. Silence took over as we had come to the horrible realization. Butters had been raped.

Chapter 1: First Day of School

Beep! Beep! Beep! Click. I woke up groggy but after a few seconds I opened my eyes to my blue ceiling and realized today was my first day of senior year. "Oh boy, Butters, today is your the start of your last year, and-and this year I will be me." Leopold 'Butters' Stotch is my name, but everyone calls me Butters. I have grown up a lot since elementary and middle school. As a senior in high school I may be a little on the small side but, I'm different now. My stutter is mostly gone, I have a job as a waiter at Bennigan's, and this year will be the year that I show my true self. You see I've always listened to everyone around me. I always did what I was supposed to and did what everyone told me to do. Well today, that's not going to happen. Also, today is a big day because this is the day I tell my parents about Kenny. Yes Kenny McCormick. You see he's my boyfriend. We've been dating since 9th grade but, we haven't told anyone at all, even our friends. But, we promised that if we were still together by the first day of senior year, we would come out together. And, we've made it! Oh I'm so excited.

After going through my closet, I finally found the box I was looking for. I've been waiting to open this box and wear my girl clothes since I bought them last month. I had to sneak it in, but now my parents will know. I decided to wear a cute Hello Kitty tank top with a cute frilly pink skirt and pink converse. Pink is my absolute favorite color, why it's just so cute. I went into the bathroom and did my make-up nice and simple. I had baby pink eye shadow on my eyelid, some mascara, a little tint of blush, and sparkly pink lip gloss to finish it off. I was nervous to go down my staircase but, I told myself over and over, I can do it. I put on a pink sweat jacket with a blue heart zipper, and I put a pink glittery bow in my blonde hair. I looked myself over and over again to make sure I was ok. My knee high socks felt weird, but new so I welcomed the feeling. They were baby pink and hot pink striped with a white bow on the top of each one. I looked adorable, I felt nervous and giddy, but I was ready.

As I descended down the stairs I could smell the aroma of buttermilk pancakes, crispy bacon, and freshly brewed coffee. I could hear my mother humming to herself as she cooked, and my father turning the pages of the newspaper he was reading. What should I do? Should I bring their attention to me? Should I sneak out the front door and wait until the afternoon? Or should I act like nothing is wrong or different at all? I felt like I was going to be sick. "Butters," my mom called my name with her sweet voice. "Come down and eat some breakfast sweetie." "O-Ok mom," I held my breath and took a step into the kitchen. "Butters," I opened my eyes to my mom and dad staring at me with confusion. "Butters, what's the matter?" I didn't realize it but I managed to let out a few tears. I wasn't prepared at all. "I-I nee-need t-to tell you something mo-mom and dad," I was stuttering like crazy. "Well what is it?" My mom seemed worried so I took a deep breath, scrunched my eyes closed, and said it all out loud. "ME AND KENNY HAVE BEEN GOING OUT FOR THREE YEARS, AND I LIKE DRESSING LIKE A GIRL, AND SINCE IT'S MY LAST YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL I DECIDED TO BE MYSELF THIS YEAR. AND I WAS AFRAID TO TELL YOU SOONER SO I KEPT IT A SECRET!" After I had spat it all out I felt relieved. I was afraid to open my eyes so I kept them closed. I heard footsteps walk towards me, I was preparing myself for the worst, but instead I felt warm arms wrap around me tightly. I opened them to see my dad hugging me, and my mom smiling next to me. Then they began to laugh. I don't know what they were laughing about though, I was standing here crying and scared, and they were laughing. "Wh-what's so funny?" My dad pulled away laughing. I was a little annoyed but, relaxed at the sound of laughing instead of yelling. "We already know. Haha," my dad giggled. "What?" Maybe I heard him wrong. "We already know you are dating Kenny, and if you like to dress like a girl it's fine," "Re-really?" "Yes, Butters," My mom was reassuring so I didn't ask them a million questions. "Wait, so how did you find out? How did you know I was dating Kenny?" My Dad was giving me a genuine smile, as my mom began to speak. "We got a call from Kenny last night. He told us everything, he said he felt like he needed to tell us first for our O.K. He was worried sick about you, so I went upstairs to give you the phone, but you were already asleep." "Kenny told you guys?" "I'm sorry if we caught you off guard, it's not Kenny's fault he sounded just like you a minute ago." "Yeah, honestly I thought he was more shaken up then you," My dad stopped me from asking anything else, and told me to eat my breakfast, so I did. Before I grabbed my orange book bag and went out the door, my mom handed me a small mirror and told me to fix my make-up before I left. I had small black tear stains down my cheeks so I washed up in the bathroom and fixed it.

Kenny and I had decided to ride to school together, so I pulled out of my driveway and headed straight to Kenny's house. When I arrived, Kenny was waiting there in a black sweatshirt, ripped jeans, and converse with a brown book bag slung around his shoulder. His blonde hair was scraggly and messy, just the way I like it. He go in the car and gave me a huge wet kiss and pulled away to observe my outfit. He smiled and pulled me into an embrace. "You look adorable today sweetie," I blushed furiously and couldn't keep away a smile. I love when he flatters me. "Why thank you Ken, so you-you told my parents last night?" "I sure did, I have never been so nervous in my life," "Why did you want to tell them and not let me?" "Did you want to tell them?" "I guess so, but no at the sa-same time, I was scared at what they would think," "Well, I told them because if they didn't agree with it I would come over and take you away right then and there. But they agreed, and I have never felt so relieved, they lifted a weight off my shoulders I'll tell you that." I hooked my arm around his neck and pulled him in to a deep kiss before driving off. "Thank you Ken," "Your welcome, buttercup," There he goes again, making me turn into a cherry. We drove to school listening to Air Supply and Kenny singing to every word of every song. "I'm all out of love. I'm so lost without you..." He sang out loud to me. When I pulled into the parking lot and shut the engine off he continued to sing, "I'm all out of love. What am I without you, I know you were right..." "Alright Ken, we're here." "So long, wha-what?" He looked at me with his goofy grin and deep blue eyes. "We're here Ken," "Oh haha, are you ready?" "I'm worried, but excited," "Don't be. Do you? Never mind," "What Ken?" "Do you want to umm, hold hands?" He looked at me with an unsure expression, and he seemed a little embarrassed." "Of course," I sounded a little too excited, but I was excited. The two of us coming out would give us a chance to sit and eat lunch with each other, hold hands in public, kiss each other good morning in homeroom, and go to school dances. I was excited for Homecoming even though it was all the way in November.

Kenny got out of the car and when I was about to open the car door he slammed it shut. "Kenny?" "Ladies don't open their own doors," I started to giggle, when Kenny opened the door for me. He grabbed my hand and led me out like a princess. "You don't have to do that Ken," "Oh, but I have too, today you are my princess or if you prefer little pink prince," "Haha, Kenny stop it, your embarrassing me." I started to blush again when he wrapped me in an embrace and leaned me onto my Cadillac and kissed me again. Our fellow classmates were eyeing us as they passed by to walk into the main doors. Some looked at us with disgust, and some looked at us with awe. When Kenny pulled away I chuckled a little, and grabbed his hand. We walked hand-in-hand through the hallways with Kenny telling me a story about how when he was a kid he was afraid of the lockers because they always killed him over and over again. I felt bad because I wasn't paying attention to his story but, rather the schedule in my hand. I had homeroom with Mr. Hanover and so did Kenny. For math, health, and science Kenny was also in my class, but English, Spanish, and history he was not. We shared the same lunch, so we would be able to sit next to each other like we hoped. That brought a lot of happiness to me. "Hey babe, is it ok if I talk to Stan and Kyle real quick?" "Sure, I'll g-go to my locker," He smiled and gave me a peck on the lips, then ran towards his friends down the hall. I started to scan the lockers down the hall to find my locker. "D-45, D-46, D-47, D-48 aha," Slam! Stinging pain was coming from my forehead. I spun around to see Clyde Donovan in front of me. "I knew you were a faggot," Clyde spat the words in my face. I was scared I didn't want to get beat, not on my first day! "I-I-I," "I-I-I I thought you didn't have a stutter anymore?" He put his arm above my head on the locker, and leaned in close, I just wanted to run away. "You know what happens to butt pirates like you?" I couldn't breathe his breath was rotten, and he had fire dancing in his eyes. Clyde was never a nice kid, at least not to me. Whack! My eye started to tear up as the temple of my head started to sting. I squinted my eyes shut getting ready for another punch when I heard a scream. "Aaaah, Get off me!" I opened my eyes to Kenny punching Clyde over and over again on the floor helplessly. "Kenny, Kenny! Stop it! He's had enough!" Stan was pulling Kenny off, with help from Kyle. "Dude, what's the matter?" "What's the matter?! He was about to beat the shit out of Butters!" Clyde scurried away. "Dude, why do you care?" "Excuse me?" Uh-oh he didn't tell Stan and Kyle yet. Maybe he didn't get a chance to yet. Oh god I did this, if I wasn't such a screw up Kenny wouldn't be going through this. Without realizing it I started to cry, not for me, but for Kenny. "Oh no, no Butters its ok don't cry. Don't cry you'll mess up your make-up." He gave me a reassuring smile. After wiping away my tears he walked over to the guys and began to speak. They seemed confused. "Stan, Kyle, Cartman..." Cartman? I looked behind Kyle to see Cartman standing there with a smirk on his face, I didn't even see him. I think he was enjoying this scene too much. Ring! Oh no, now I'm going to be late on the first day too. This wasn't the greatest start of the school year. "Before I was interrupted by that asshole, I was going to tell you that Butters," He walked over to me and put his arm around my shoulder puling me in close, protecting me. "...is my boyfriend," The guys had an even more confused expression, they looked like they were about to start laughing when Cartman spoke up. "Psh, if your going to pull off a joke you could've at least made it funnier then that Kenny," Kenny tensed up over me, he gave them a scowl then dove down and gave me a huge kiss. When he pulled away I could see Stan and Kyle's expression was of shock. Cartman just seemed amused. "Now if you'll excuse me. Me and my BOYFRIEND will be going to homeroom now," He felt the need to emphasize boyfriend before giving them a hard glare and turning his back on them. He took a hold of my hand and walked me to homeroom. He was rushing and seemed harsh, but his grip on me was gentle.

Besides being late to homeroom, the rest of the day was ok. I knew I was getting a black eye throughout the day, but it didn't bother me as much as I'd thought. History went by slow and boring as it usually does every year. Second period however, went by too fast for my taste, because Kenny was next to me. When the teacher wasn't talking Kenny and I were passing notes about what we were going to do after school. 'You want to go to the pond? – Ken' 'Sure, maybe we can finish that carving. –Buttercup' He gave me a wink and I blushed. The bell rang for third period and Stan, Kyle, and Eric were in our math class. Kenny and I sat in the back of the room so we could sit next to each other without people staring at us. Kenny told me it doesn't bother him that they're out, but that people staring at you while you're trying to do work is impossible. "So after school I have to go to work, but afterwards we can go to the pond for a picnic," "That sounds great, can you pick up some cheeseburgers from work?" "Yeah, they won't mind, actually they," I stopped talking when I saw Stan and Kyle walk over to our desks. Kenny turned around wondering why I had stopped and saw the two sit down right in front of us. They turned around and gave us a smile. "What?" Kenny seemed frustrated. "We wanted to apologize," "Yeah" As always Kyle was taking the lead and speaking for the both of them. "We thought you were kidding but, umm you're not," "Yeah dude if your gay, you're gay, and Butters isn't that bad of catch either," I guess Stan didn't mean for that to slip out because, he began to turn red as a tomato. Kenny giggled, that was a good sign. "Thanks guys, hey you guys want to come with us to the pond later? Butter is bring some cheeseburgers from work," "Really? Butters I didn't know you had a job," Kyle seemed interested about my life all of a sudden. It made me happy to know that I could be their friend soon too. "Yeah, I've been working at Bennigan's for two years now as a waiter." "Alright class, take your seats. I am Ms. Dickson. I will be your math teacher for this year..." Blah blah blah, when teachers talk it really bugs me especially when Kenny is sitting right there. Well we only have 45 minutes, it will go by quickly.

Ring! That was the longest class ever! She talked the entire time. If she had given us an assignment of some kind, it would have gone by a lot faster. For me at least, I don't know about the other guys. It was time for lunch, finally because I was hungry. I might act like a girl, but that doesn't mean I can't eat like a boy. I love food and I can say the same for Kenny and the other guys. All math class I couldn't help but wonder where Cartman was though. I know he was in that class, when she was calling out attendance she called his name, but he wasn't there. He probably skipped class. He does that sometimes especially during math and English. I guess I didn't expect him to skip on the first day. Maybe we will see him at lunch, I hope we don't but if something happened then I'd feel bad. I would never wish evil on anyone even if it's people like Eric Cartman. On our way to lunch Stan and Kyle seemed to be close, not too close but close enough to get me and Kenny's attention. Maybe they were special friends or maybe they had a secret. I think Kenny was thinking the same thing because he looked at me with a look that I knew meant something was up. We walked into the busy lunch room and decided to sit at an empty lunch table next to the empty aisle that led to the lunch booth. After Kenny and I got our lunches we met up with Kyle and Stan bracing ourselves for a million questions. "Hey guys," "He-Hello Kyle," We sat across from Stan and Kyle, Kenny insisted that I sit in his lap so I did. "So how long have you guys been going out?" Kyle seemed relieved almost when he asked the question. "Well we've been going out for three years now," Stan shot up from stuffing his mouth with mashed potatoes, "Really!?" "We-well we were going to te-tell you guys sooner bu-but, I was afraid of wh-what you guys would think about Kenny," "Well why were on the subject I think we can trust you guys to know that-" "Hey asshole!" We all turned to see Clyde staring at Kenny with a bruise on the side of his face. Token, Tweek, and Craig were standing beside him. Kenny gently pushed me off his lap and stood up, he looked agitated. "Kenny now calm down, just ignore him," Kenny looked at me with understanding in his eyes and sat beside me. "Oh no, you're going to pay for what you did get'em boys," Without hesitation Token and Craig came up behind us and pulled Kenny out of his seat and dragged to the middle of the floor and began to kick him. I shot up out of my seat. No way was I going to stand by and let them hurt Kenny. "Hey leave him alone," Just as quickly as this morning, I was on the ground crying after another throw to the face. I was being held down by Tweek who was threatening to break my neck if I so much as twitched. I watched Kenny helplessly as they picked him up by his shoulders. He was exasperated and couldn't breathe Kyle and Stan were trying so helplessly to pull them off of Kenny but, they were stronger then them. They were on the football team. "Craig! Get off him!" Stan was yelling and tugging on Craig's shoulder almost dangling off of him, but Craig wasn't moving an inch. Kyle was pulling on Token when he elbowed Kyle in the stomach and he fell to the ground. The cafeteria watched some chanted, some looked horrified, and others didn't care. "Kenny!" My voice was hoarse from Tweak holding on to my throat just barely enough for me to breath. "Kenny! Get off him!" I tried and tried but, yelling didn't help. Tears ran down my face as I screamed for them to get off of him. Wham! I could hear the cafeteria doors slam open. Everyone stopped except for the boys punching Kenny until one of them was flying across the floor and another was on the ground with a bloodied nose. Tweek pushed off me and ran out the door, and I used all my strength to get up off the ground and run to Kenny. "And, don't you ever put a hand on either one of them again or I will kill you!" I turned around to see a large boy in a Screwdriver T-Shirt holding Clyde by the collar of his shirt. He threw him down and turned around and knelt down next to Kenny. It was Eric Cartman.

I've been sitting in the Nurse's office for an hour and Kenny still hasn't woken up. He looked like a lost and hurt puppy lying there with a white blanket on him, and bruises allover. We can forget all about the picnic date, it's not important. Until Kenny feels better I'm not leaving this spot. The bell rang for fifth period, English. "Is he awake yet?" "Ah! Oh, uh, no," I was startled by the boy who saved my boyfriend's very life. "Thank you Eric," "Don't thank me," He looked at me with tired eyes. His hands were wrapped in bandages from punching Craig and Token so hard. "Ar-are you ok?" I gestured to his hands and he smiled. "Battle scars are always ok, so how are you?" He walked over and sat in the blue chair next to the foot of Kenny's bed while I sat next to his sleeping head. "I-I've been ok, I'm worried about Kenny though," "I bet you are," A deafening silence came between us for a few minutes before he spoke again. "I'm going to protect Kenny," I looked at him with a puzzling look. "I mean he's my friend, not only is he my only friend, but he's my best friend, even is he doesn't know it," He looked at Kenny with a sympathetic expression that I've only seen Eric make when something happens with his mother. "He's not your only friend," I got up and walked over to him making sure he was aware. He looked up at me with expressionless brown eyes with a glint of happiness. I think he was trying to cover it up. I wrapped my arms around his neck and gave him a huge hug. He didn't hug back. "You have always been my friend, and I'll always be your friend," "Why?" he threw me off guard. I pulled away and sat back down in my seat and gave him a concerned look. "Why am I your friend? I have always been terrible to you," That is true he has always been to me and has always done terrible things to me. "I guess I'm your fr-friend because, I am the only one besides Kenny, who see the goodness in you. You have a good side, you just show it in such sm-small ways that no one else notices," "I'm not a good person," He stood up gave Kenny a small pat on the shoulder and left the room without another word. I felt bad for him. It was rare occasions like these that I saw the real Eric Cartman. Hopefully, he'll see what Kenny and I see soon.

When Kenny woke up the nurse gave both of us notes for us to leave the school, Kenny needed rest, but he had no one to pick him up. His mom was working and his dad doesn't have a car. I supported him with my shoulder and carried him out to my car. I called out of work for the day before starting the engine and heading straight to my house. I wasn't going to leave Kenny in this condition at his house. He had barely any food and the water was full of rust. I'm surprised he's as healthy as he is aside from his new injuries. When I pulled into the driveway my mother was taking groceries into the house, when she came out the door to find me carrying Kenny up the driveway with a black eye she forgot everything she was doing and ran over to us. "What happened?" she shouted, "Well mo-mom, one of the kids at school and his friends beat up Kenny, I tried t-to stop them but they just kept at it," "Oh dear, here let me help," She grabbed Kenny and brought him inside while I brought in the rest of the groceries. After putting all the groceries away, I walked into the living room to see Kenny lying down with an ice pack on the side of his face. My mother put a pink quilt she had made over him and told him to rest while she made dinner. She went into the kitchen to make supper, while I sat on the floor beside Kenny watching television.

When I was finished washing the dinner dishes, I told my mom that Kenny is going to spend the night here and that I would go over to his house and pick up some new clothes. She agreed and brought him upstairs to lie on my bed. She was very lenient when it came to my relationships so having a girl, or a boy, in my bed was never a problem. I am very grateful for that. My dad would have a problem with it when he came home from work, but for now I was excited. I drove over to Kenny's and told his mother what had happened, she understood why it was better for him to stay at his house and allowed me to come in and grab some clothes for him. I knew he was going to be at my house for a few days so I packed a duffle bag with pajamas, shirts, jeans, and enough underwear and socks. I even packed his picture of him and his sister at Super Phun Thyme, and his toothbrush. When I got everything I needed I said goodbye to everyone and told Karen that she can come over to see Kenny if she gets worried. I left for home feeling content with myself. When I got home, I went upstairs and got a shower, put my pajamas on, brushed my teeth, put Kenny's things in my room, and slid under my covers. I thought Kenny was already sleeping, until he wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on the top of my head. I smiled and hugged him back. He kissed the top of my head and whispered, "I love you," I smiled a huge smile and kissed his hand before whispering back, "I love you, too Ken," and with that we both closed our eyes and fell asleep in each other's arms.


	2. Chapter 2: Double Date

Chapter 2: Double Date

Beep! Beep! Beep! I opened my eyes to the sweet orange glow of the sun beaming on my face through the curtains. I could feel the warmth resting on my cheeks. Beep! Beep! Beep! I tried to pull my arm out to turn off the alarm clock, but when I pulled I heard a grumble. At first I was startled but, then I remembered it was Kenny. I rolled over even closer to his chest and put his face in my hands and pulled him down for a good morning kiss. That woke him up. "Hey, what are you doing?" His voice was hoarse and rough, but it was playful all the same. "Te-Teehee, nothing," He smiled at me and pecked me on the forehead. Beep! Beep! Beep! Click. Finally that stupid clock is off. I got up from bed and tried to get Kenny up but, he wouldn't budge. "Kenny, come on we have to get ready for school," "But, I don't want to," He whined like a little child. He finally did get out from the covers to reveal himself in blue boxers and his NASCAR T-Shirt from yesterday. "I got you some clothes from your house last night," "A few? So I get to spend more than one night with my little buttercup?" His voice was still rough and quiet, but playful still. He walked into the bathroom with me and wrapped his arms around me. "Yes, Kenny you w-will be here for a few days," "Well maybe then can we?" He raised his eyebrows up and down in the mirror while my expression was covered with a tint of pink. "I don't know Kenny," Kenny has been trying to get me to open up, and let me lose my virginity to him, but I am still uncertain. It's not that I'm scared or anything, it's just a moment that needs to be just right. Kenny never pushed me, but he has always hinted or suggested it. Don't get me wrong we didn't go three years doing absolutely nothing, but my virginity is the only thing that I have complete control over. I hope the time comes soon, for Kenny's sake.

Crash! Kenny and I whipped our heads around to face the doorway and find pieces of glass on the floor. Kenny left me in the bathroom to investigate. The cold air from outside was flooding my room and giving me chills. "Wh-what was that?" Kenny didn't answer. "K-Kenny," I slowly crept my way into my room to find Kenny standing in front of my window with a brick. "Wh-what happened?" Wham! "Is everything alright?!" My mother and father were bursting through the doorway with fear in their eyes. "Butters, what happened?" My mom asked me in a motherly manner running over to hug me. "W-well mom I don't," "Assholes!" My family looked over to see Kenny standing on the glass holding a brick with anger. "It was probably Clyde and his friends, look," With that he showed my dad and I a red brick with the words faggot in white paint on it. Kenny was so angry, and he tensed up until I put a hand on his shoulder to ease him. "I'm sorry Butters," "Aww Ken, you don't have to apologize," My mom gave me and Kenny a sympathetic look, while my father hugged us both. "I'll clean this mess up, Linda why don't you finish up breakfast?" "Alright Chris, Butters, Kenny do you guys want anything special?" "No ma'am that's ok," "N-no thanks mom, just pancakes will be fine," She gave us a hug before going downstairs to fix up breakfast while my dad was cleaning up the glass. Kenny tried to assist my dad but, he insisted that he do it. Kenny got a shower while I did my make-up. I was wearing denim skinny jeans with pink Ugg boots, a baby pink cashmere sweater, and a baby pink hairclip. I noticed my hair was getting long it was down to my chin, for me that was progress. It didn't bother me because I was trying to grow it out long. My make-up was the same as yesterday, pink. When I was about finished Kenny stepped out of the shower dripping wet with everything showing. I was trying not to look in fear of pitching a tent. He dried himself off and began to get dressed. I wasn't paying attention much so I didn't realize he was wearing one of my shirts with his jeans. "How fabulous am I?" I turned around to see Kenny in his worn down jeans, converse, and my light blue shirt with a unicorn and rainbow on the front. I started to giggle. "What am I not fabulous?" Kenny was only about two or three inches taller then me so all of my clothes would probably fit him, so the shirt didn't look bad at all. "You look adorable Ken doll," "Ken doll, well then I guess your Barbie?" We burst out laughing. After our laughing fit we headed downstairs for apple pancakes with buttery syrup. Kenny and I were eating them like potato chips, they were that good. You couldn't just have one or two or three. We had managed to eat fifteen pancakes all together I know because my mom only makes twenty-one. I think she has OCD when it comes to cooking.

When we were done stuffing our mouths we grabbed our book bags and left for school. Kenny wanted to drive today so I let him, and began to talk. "S-so Ken, you want to have that picnic after school? An-and invite Stan and Kyle?" "Sure, we're still getting cheeseburgers, right?" "Yup, and maybe Stan and Kyle can bring dessert," "I thought you were bringing dessert," "What? I'm bringing the cheeseburgers, if you want me too I could try and," "I was talking about you cutie," I blushed a little from embarrassment and a little from flattery. When we got to school Stan and Kyle were waiting for us with a blunt object in their hand. "Hey guys," "Hey Kenny," Stan seemed shaken up and gave Kenny a brick. It looked like the brick we had go through our window. When he turned it over something was written on it. 'I know your secret faggot'. "Wh-what secret? What are they talking ab," "We have absolutely no idea what they are talking about, but Stan woke up and found that in his room. It looks like someone threw it through the window," Kyle looked rushed like he had been up all night, and his expression was showing worry. "Well is there anything you're hiding Stan?" "N-no I have no idea, wh-what they're talking about," Stuttering, worried, and fidgeting they are hiding something. "Well dude we got the same thing this morning," "What?" Stan and Kyle spoke in unison with worried faces. "Yeah, me and Butters were getting ready for school when it happened," "My window is shattered, and we found a brick to bu-but, it said a mean word," "What did it say?" Kyle once again was taking the lead of talking and asking questions. "I-it said umm, fa-faggot," I hated that word. I didn't like how it rolled off my tongue. "Oh, I'm sorry," "K-Kyle you don't have to apologize for what someone else did," "Butters and I are going to go to the pond for dinner tonight, do you guys want to come?" They looked at each other for a minute, both with the same peculiar look. "Sure".

We all went through the day pretty quickly, with the occasional glare from Clyde and his group. When the final bell rang, Kenny decided to hang out with Stan and Kyle for awhile while I went to work. We would all meet up at Stark's Pond at 6. I went to work and was able to get five cheeseburgers and some fries. I asked for five just in case they decided to bring Eric, he wasn't at school today so I don't know where he's been. I called his house a few times throughout the day to make sure he was alright but, he wasn't answering. Maybe I'll go over there and check on him tomorrow morning before school. He will probably get mad if I wake him up early but, as long as he's ok. Before heading over to the pond I stopped at my house to change into something more date like. I wore a purple v-neck dress with a black belt, and knee high black heeled boots. My make-up was purple eye shadow with black eyeliner and clear lip gloss. I put a black hair band in my hair before wishing my mom and dad goodnight thinking we would be back late. On my way to Stark's pond I saw Stan, Kyle, and Kenny walking on the sidewalk and pulled up next to them to give them a ride. When we got to the pond we walked the back trail until we found a clearing facing the pond. I brought a red blanket and as Kyle and Stan were laying it down, Kenny and I were taking out the food. The sun was setting over the pond giving the sky an orange and pink atmosphere and reflecting the colors onto the water below. There were only a few cloud streaks across the sky. They were orange with purple bellies. The trees were tall and dark surrounding the pond and enclosing us with the mountain beauty. Kyle and Stan were dressed up as well as Kenny. Stan was wearing denim jeans and a black button up long sleeve shirt, Kyle was wearing gray jeans and a navy blue long sleeve button up shirt, and Kenny was wearing his red long sleeve shirt with denim jeans, I think they were Stan's or Kyle's. All of their hair was messy except for Kyle who had styling gel in his hair so his curls wouldn't bounce up so badly.

We ate our dinner and talked about the old days of when we were all kids in this crazy mountain town. The entire time I saw Kyle creeping slowly closer to Stan's side. I think I am the only one who has noticed, unless it's all in my head. "So have you guys done it yet?" Kyle was giggling about his question as Kenny leaned over and put his shoulder around me. "Well Kyle, sadly no, my little buttercup wants to wait until it feels right," He pecked me on the cheek before sitting back up and started to chuckle. "Well that sucks we would've given you pointers," We all turned to Stan who was now beat red and horribly covering his tracks. "I meant uh," "He meant pointers," Stan turned towards Kyle who was smiling down at his hand in his lap. "Wh-what?" I was so confused, and I think Kenny was too. "Well guys, umm, before the incident at lunch we were going to tell you that umm, we-" "Are together,"" When Stan finished Kyle's sentence he turned towards Kenny to see Kenny grinning like an idiot. He started to move his hands in front of him, trying to clarify what he heard. "Wait, wait, wait Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski are together?" Stan looked over to Kyle to clarify, and Kyle leaned down and kissed him. "So-so how long have you guys be-been together?" "Well umm, we've been together for one, two, three, four, five years now," "Yeah we were planning to come out actually during homecoming," "Oh, re-really? I can't wait for homecoming, even though it's in November," "Yeah I was going to help pick out the dress," Kenny looked over to me and smiled again. Now that Kenny and I knew Stan and Kyle were together they were comfortable enough to show their affection, so Stan laid his head on Kyle's lap. "So, you guys already did it?" Stan started to blush again, and so did Kyle but he wasn't as bad. "Well we did it on our third year anniversary. I mean of course we did the light stuff before that," "Yeah that's how we are right now, isn't that right Buttercup?" "Ye-yeah," I smiled knowing we all would get along much better knowing we're all swinging for the same team. "I think since you guys beat us to the chase we won't have to wait until homecoming," "What?" I thought Kyle was disagreeing with Stan but, a huge smile spread across his face showing otherwise. "Really, we can?" "Yeah, why not these two our out, so it's not like we're the only ones anymore," Kyle started to chuckle and bent over to give Stan a huge kiss before freaking out like a girl. "So the question is, who is the bitch?" Kenny looked at the two boys across from us with a goofy grin on his face. "In bed or in general," I wasn't expecting that answer from Stan at all but, now I'm really interested. "Well, first in bed, then in general," Kenny seemed satisfied with his response smiling at them before grabbing me and pulling me into his lap, facing the two boys in front of us. I relaxed in his arms and held his hands together around my stomach with mine waiting for their answer. "Stan is a little moaning bitch in bed, but you'd be surprised to know that I am the one who would wear a dress if I could. "Re-really?" I was excited knowing Kyle would like dressing in dresses maybe he likes make-up too. "Do-do you like make-up?" "Oh my god yes, I have three palettes at home in my closet, do you use M.A.C. or the cheap stuff?" "I-I order my stuff online from Sugar Pill, but Kenny got me M.A.C. brushes for my birthday two years ago," "Oh my god, can I do your make-up one day?" "Well sure Kyle, I would love to do yours too," We started giggling and talking about make-up and different hairstyles we could do while Stan and Kenny just looked at us dumbfounded. "What about a slumber party? We could do each other's hair and make-up. Oh! We could do a photo shoot!" "I've al-always wanted to have a slumber party! We can have it at my house when my basement is finished," "Your basement?" Kenny looked at me with a quirked eye brow and confusion. "Yes Kenny, we-weren't you listening earlier? My parents are turning the basement into a living sp-space for me, well you could live with me when it's finished," "I'd love that!" "Well you to are adorable," "Oh so are you and St-Stan".

The rest of the evening we told stories from when we were younger, Stan and Kenny talked about football, and Kyle and I discussed details about the slumber party we were now planning. "Wait so-so when are you planning to tell your parents ab-about you and Stan?" I guess it never crossed Kyle's mind because he now had a scared expression on his face. "I didn't even think about it," "We-well would you like me and Kenny to be there with you?" "That's ok Butters me and Stan will tell them tomorrow. I don't know about his parents though, I think they could care less," "Oh, alright then". Kenny and Stan were talking about Stan's old dog Sparky when Kyle interrupted them. "Hey guys, are you guys coming to the sleepover?" Kenny looked at me with a look that said, 'Do I have to?' I nodded my head yes, and he answered, "Yeah, why not?", "Yeah sure Kyle. Hey Butters will Kenny be there?" "Ye-yes he will," with that I looked at him with a grin across my face. "Stan what are you going to do about your parents?" Kyle looked at him with concern. "I don't think my dad will care at maybe he will exaggerate a little but, he's my dad. My mom is accepting of anything I do so I'm not scared to tell my parents anything. What about you Kyle?" "I don't know I want us to come out to them tomorrow but, I don't know how my mom will take it. I know my dad is cool, they always are, but my mom forget it, I don't know what to expect," "How did you guys tell your parents?" "We-well I was suppose to tell them the morning before sc-school, but Kenny called them the night before and told them," "I was protecting him I was afraid of what his parents might do. If they disagreed I would run all the way there and take him back to my place," "Ho-how did you tell your parents Kenny? Because when I went to go get your clothes they knew already," "I straight up told them, my dad told me to look at his playboys for reassurance, but my mom thought it was brave of me," Stan, Kenny, and I had parents who either didn't care at all, or was very accepting of it, Kyle's dad was too, but his mom we were unsure of.

The street lamps came on and our phones read 10:14, it was time to go home. I drove Kyle and Stan home and started to head home when Kenny told me to pull over. "What's the ma-matter Ken?" "Let's, let's go to Cartman's house," "What? Wh-why?" "He skipped the first day of school, and he didn't show up today," "Well ma-maybe he's under the weather," "He wouldn't miss lunch or history for one day, you know that as well as I do," "Oh, alright then," I drove to Eric's house to find all his lights were on, but his room. I waited in the car while Kenny went to go knock on the door. Crash! We heard what sounded like a cupboard full of fine china crash on the ground. Kenny burst through the door to find Ms. Cartman in a ball on the floor with bruises covering her body. A broad, tall man with a shaved head and dog tags was standing above her with a broken bottle. "I don't care about your son, I don't care if he's gone, I don't ca," Wham! Kenny attacked the man from behind and pulled him down to the ground. The man whipped his arm around and cut Kenny's arm, I was out of the car and helping Ms. Cartman off the floor and up the stairs. "Ms. Cartman where's yo-your phone?" "It's up, it's upstairs," When we got to the top of the steps, Ms. Cartman rested her head against the wall, sitting on the floor, while I was looking for the phone. When I looked downstairs the man had run out the door and Kenny was coming up the stairs. "Ms. Cartman, are you alright?" "Yes, thank you," I went into Eric's room and turned the light on to look for the phone and screamed. "What is it!?" Kenny was frantic and worried. "What's wrong?" Without saying a word I looked at Kenny with tear-filled eyes and turned back to the terrible scene in front of me. Kenny turned around and gasped. A large boy was leaning against the wall with his arms upright on his sides. There was so much blood everywhere. I was going to be sick. Kenny ran towards him. He shook Eric awake. "Cartman! What the hell are you doing?!" "Wh-what?" Eric was out of it he was slurring and exasperated. I ran to the phone that was laying on his nightstand and called 911. I started to cry more and fell to the ground, we had forgotten about Ms. Cartman. I couldn't believe it. Why would Eric do this? Kenny was kneeling down in front of Eric and trying to keep him awake. Kenny threw the scissors beside Eric across the room and was keeping his arms up, until the ambulance arrived.

The ambulance came and went, and we were on our way home. Kenny told me that we could visit him tomorrow. I couldn't drive I was to emotional, Kenny was too, but he knew how to control it. When we got home my mom and dad were standing outside waiting for us. They had set up the pull out bed in the living room, since we could not sleep in my room. "Wh-why mom?" "Shh, I don't know honey," my mom was always good at comforting me when something tragic happened. I couldn't speak, I couldn't think, so I lied on the bed and cried. My mother kissed me goodnight and left me and Kenny to go to sleep. I was so broken. I couldn't stop the water pouring out of my eyes. Kenny eased my tension a little by wrapping his arms around me. I cried my self to sleep in Kenny's arms wishing for it all to be just a dream.


	3. Chapter 3: The Evidence

Chapter 3: The Evidence

The sun was bright through my mother's curtains, and Kenny was beside me, he looked like an angel. When I sat up I groaned in agony, my head was pounding. My eyes were sore, and my pillow had a little patch of wetness. I cried myself to sleep. It was early and no one else was awake, I started to remember last night. Ms. Cartman, that man, the blood, and…Eric. Why would he do that to him self? The cuts were so deep, it must have felt unbearable. But he did it. Not only was he in pain but, he caused it. I decided to investigate a little, because I knew asking Eric a million questions would just result in frustration. He would never give me straight forward answer. I slowly snuck out of bed put on my sneakers and snuck outside. When I looked at the clock on the fire place it read 5:43 so it was really early for anyone to be up. I was afraid of waking anybody up so I tiptoed out the front door. I used to live right next to Eric's house but, we moved down the street because, our house had become too small for us. While I was walking the sun kept my face warm with its sweet embrace and brightened by the minute. The snow was glimmering with the sunlight and the town was so peaceful.

When I arrived at Eric's house emotions were starting to swell up to my eyes, on the verge of breaking loose. I took a deep breath and held in my tears and walked right through his front door. When I closed the front door the silence was deadly, it was deafening. Not one sound stirred in the house. The china cabinet was shattered and broken on the ground blocking the archway to the kitchen, and the smell of dirty dishes and fabric freshener filled the air. His old brown couch was worn down and beat up, and his coffee table was scratched up from his old cat Mr. Kitty. He loved that cat more then the world, I remember when his cat passed away, Eric spoke to no one for at least a month. He was devastated. I slowly began to walk up the stairs to his room, looking at the pictures hanging in beautiful patterned frames, all though worn down. "Loo loo l-loo, you g-got some apples, loo l-loo loo, you got so-some too," I began to sing to calm my nerves and to prevent myself from crying and before I knew it I was standing in front of Eric's door. I cautiously turned the door knob in fear of finding the horrible scene again. His room was dark and the air's aroma was different then the rest of the house. It reeked of smoke and alcohol. His bed was unmade, his desk was covered in piles of paper and cigarette buds, and small piles of dirty clothes stayed strewn about the floor. Where we found Eric there were two small puddles of dried up blood and a piece of note book paper folded up. I don't remember seeing the little piece of paper. I picked it up gently and unfolded its edges, it was a note.

To Whom It May Concern,

If you are reading this you have probably found me dead. Know that I was tired, tired of taking care of my mother, tired of taking care of myself alone, and tired of having no love in my life. Whoever is reading this probably cares less about me and jumping with joy that I am gone. I've escaped. I am not a good person, I know Hell awaits me. I am cruel, rude, fat, and insensitive to the people I care about. Their lives are better without me, and I know I'm better without me. I don't deserve to have love and that's why I am tired. Fighting and reaching for something you can have is worth living for, but I am reaching for something that I know I can never have. I can never have love because, I am a bad person, but today I will protect you.

-Eric Cartman

I couldn't hold the tears in anymore, I had to let them spill out. I wanted Eric to be happy. I wanted him to want to live. He was trying to kill himself. As I was crying I got a glimpse of what the papers on his desk were, when I looked closer I noticed they were bills. Most of them were overdue but, some were paid. Only a handful I would guess. All over on the floor vodka and whiskey bottles remained empty and deserted. I felt even more terrible and started to sob. I ran out of the house and back to my house screaming at myself inside. "Butters!" before I looked up I crashed into Kenny. We fell down on the ground hard and Kenny hit his head on the cold sidewalk under us. "Ow!" I hurried off of Kenny and began to cry even more because I had hurt him. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I fell to the ground in a crying mess when Kenny wrapped his arms around me. "Butters, what happened?" He was rocking me back and forth trying to get me to calm down. I couldn't talk I knew I couldn't talk so I gave him the crumpled piece of paper that was in my hand. He slowly pulled it out of my hand before I let out another stream of tears. "Shh, Butters?" I took deep breaths and sniffled. "I-I we-went over t-to Eric's hou-house t-to find out wh-why he wou-would do that an-and I found th-that!" With that I let out another cry before more tears streamed down my face. Kenny looked at me with concerned expression before he helped me up and took me inside where my mother was making coffee and my father was reading the newspaper as usual. I guess Kenny didn't want to upset my parents with me crying so he snuck me upstairs to my room. My window was covered with a big piece of cardboard to prevent the cold air from spilling in. Kenny led me over to my bed and sat me down and began rocking me back and forth again. "You can tell me Butters it's ok," I closed my eyes and took more deep breaths until I was calm enough to speak. I must have taken a long time because, when I began to talk I startled Kenny. "I-I was going over to Eric's house to see if there was anything t-to explain wh-why Eric would do that t-to himself and I found this no-note and I found bills, bottles, cigarettes even. I didn't know," I started up the water works again. "Shh, it's ok. It's ok, I'll go over and see if there's anything else ok?" "B-but there isn't, look at that note th-that explains everything!" Kenny gave me a peck on the cheek before lifting his arm off of me to read the note. I saw his eyes scan through the paper concentrating on this little but, big piece of information. When he had read it a dozen times he didn't move. He didn't say anything about the note. "Ho-how about you and your parents go visit Eric in the hospital while I go over to his house," "But Ken," "No, I need to see for myself," I nodded my head and understood why Kenny needed to do this. He always had his own way of dealing with his emotions, sometimes they would burst out of nowhere. Sometimes he keeps them all to himself. What he had to do, he had to do on his own. "Ok Ken, you'll meet up with us right?" "Right, and we should probably call the school and tell them we're out today," "Oh yeah," I gave Kenny a kiss before heading downstairs to talk to my parents and leave to see Eric. After, I ate breakfast my mom called the school to excuse Kenny and I, then the hospital to let them know we were coming over. I grabbed my coat and put on my sneakers and we headed out to see Eric. I hope Kenny comes to see Eric soon. I don't want to be with Eric alone knowing that we saved him from his wishes. My parents are good company but, they don't know what happened this morning, or what Eric tried to do last night.

Kenny's Point Of View:

After Butters had left the room I sunk my head into my hands. How could I be so blind? Was I really that oblivious to it? I went through the same thing, and Cartman was there to help me through it, even if he was an ass about it. He was going through one of the most difficult parts of his life and I wasn't there for him. I'm a terrible friend.

As I was walking to Cartman's house I had almost run into Kyle on his way to school. "Hey, hey Kenny," "What, oh, hey," "Dude, school is that way, "Yeah I know, I'm not going to school today," "What, why?" "I need to, it's about Cartman," "Oh, what did the Nazi-bastard do this time?" "Kyle, please. He-he did something stupid last night," I shrugged and looked over to see Kyle walking with me to Cartman's house. "That sounds like Cartman being himself," "No, I mean really stupid, like if he had succeeded he wouldn't be able to go back and fix it," "What do you mean? Is he in jail or something?" I started to have shortened breaths and accidently let a tear run down my face, causing Kyle to stop and grab my shoulder. I looked over and saw his eyes full of worry. "Did he do something to Butters?" I wiped my tears away with my hand and continued walking with Kyle beside me. "No, he-he did something to himself," I was going to lose it if I kept talking so I took out the paper Butters gave to me out of my pocket and handed it Kyle, who looked at me with confusion. He took the paper and read it silently then aloud for reassurance. "If you are reading this you have probably found me dead. Know that I was tired, tired of taking care of my mother, tired of taking care of myself alone, and tired of having no love in my life. Whoever is reading this probably cares less about me and jumping with joy that I am gone. I've escaped. I am not a good person, I know Hell awaits me. I am cruel, rude, fat, and insensitive to the people I care about. Their lives are better without me, and I know I'm better without me. I don't deserve to have love and that's why I am tired. Fighting and reaching for something you can have is worth living for, but I am reaching for something that I know I can never have. I can never have love because, I am a bad person. Eric Cartman," I looked over to him expecting to see a confused or shocked expression, instead it was one of sadness and regret. "Wh-why would he do that? What did he do to himself, tell me Kenny," He started to get angry and frustrated. "I don't know he-he took a pair of scissors," I was losing my breath and biting my lip to prevent my self from screaming. "And he sliced open his arms, oh it was awful. Butters screamed and I held is arms up trying to keep him awake. When the ambulance got there they said if we weren't there when we were, he' be gone. He would be gone. He'd be dead," I held it in the tears and bit my lip again. "Kenny, I'm sorry," I let go right there, I dropped to my knees and pried. Kyle gave me a hug and I cried into his shoulder. He brought me up as I relieved my tears into his sweatshirt. I let it all out. I pulled away and continued to walk to Cartman's house after I had wiped away my tears. Kyle pulled out his cell phone and was dialing a number. "Hey Stan, can you skip school today?" I looked over to Kyle and took a minute to observe my friend. He was wearing a black sweatshirt, blue jeans, and his worn down white converse that were now a brownish gray. It seemed that everybody had converse in this town except for Stan who always wore boots. "Yeah, well I'm with Kenny and uh, something happened can you meet up with us?" He looked to me for an answer to his question, where are we going? "We're going to Cartman's house for a look around his mom isn't home so we can just walk in," He shook his head and told Stan where to meet him then hanged up.

When we got to Cartman's house the door was open from Butters running out earlier, I guessed. I took the first step inside observing the room and the damaged inflicted on the atmosphere last night. Everything was out of place about the feeling of the room, I was nervous, scared even. I was frightened of the events that took place in the room. I told Kyle what had happened last night and why we were over here in the first place. He seemed stunned about what had happened and spoke very little. I was heading for the kitchen when we heard a knock on the door. "It's probably Stan," "Alright just tell him to be careful in here there's shattered glass everywhere." Kyle went to the door and let Stan in who had a puzzled face. "Hey Kenny," I looked up from glass and looked over to Stan who was observing the mess. "Hey, Stan," Stan looked at me with a confused looked and looked down on the fallen china cabinet. "What happened?" "Something bad," I glanced at Kyle who got the idea that I didn't want to talk about it so he explained the situation to Stan. "Dude," "Yeah, I know," I passed Stan and Kyle to head up the stairs with suspicion. The other two followed pursuit. I saw that Cartman's door was wide open, and the aroma changed. I walked into the room with caution and saw a glimpse of last night's happenings. I saw the blood on the floor and stopped breathing for a moment as another line of wetness slithered down my cheek. I snapped out of it and turned away from the blood. I looked around the room for something as to who the guy was who attacked Mrs. Cartman was or what Butters was talking about bills. I went over to his desk to see piles of envelopes and papers stacked high. All the pages read overdue, bill paid, foreclosure notice. Why would they all be in his room and not Mrs. Cartman's? "Why are bills on all over Cartman's desk?" Stan's eyes grew sincere and sympathetic as we went through his bills. "Because he was paying them," I saw them look over to me briefly before I turned away and looked on the ground. A composition book was resting on a stack of textbooks, so I reached down and picked it up. "I guess Cartman still writes," Kyle looked at me while Stan was still searching through the documents in front of us. I flipped open the note book and tried to make out the scribbles written on the pages. "I am tired. I am going to die soon hopefully," There was a drawing of a fat kid hanging on a noose. I lifted the notebook and showed the drawing to the two of them. "Dude," I looked over to Kyle for a sign of some good news, but he couldn't speak. "What are we going to do about this?" Kyle and I looked to Stan. "I mean we can't just stand here and do nothing, he's our friend," he was a nervous wreck with fear in his eyes. "Right now we don't know a lot and Cartman is in the hospital. I think we should just be there for him while he needs us," "Kenny what about Butters?" Stan looked to Kyle and me before asking again. "What about Butters?" "He's the one who told me," "What?" They both said in unison staring at me with confusion. "He's the one that found the letter," We all glanced at each other before nodding our heads in agreement to leave. "We need to meet up with Butters at the hospital," "We can take my car," "Thanks Stan," "No problem."

We left Cartman's house and headed for the hospital. We sat in the waiting room for awhile before going into Cartman's room. I wanted Butters to have his talk with him. His parents left and he was left alone in the room. The door opened and Butters was standing there in tears I ran over to him and squeezed him tight. "Butters, Butters what's the matter?" "H-he told me why," He sniffled. "What do you mean?" "H-he is si-sick of taking ca-care of everyone else," He started sobbing into my shoulder and I placed my hand on the back of his head. The other two boys were looking at me with sympathy in their eyes. They couldn't do anything. I couldn't do anything when Butters is this upset. All we can do is try to talk to him and calm him down. I told Kyle and Stan that Butters and I needed to go home, and that we would talk to Cartman tomorrow. With that we all went home.

Butters and I lied around the rest of the day watching television and sharing oodles and noodles. We cuddled on the pull out bed, and didn't talk at all. Karen came by to check up on me and we talked for awhile before she left, leaving me and Butters two cookies she had baked. Butters nibbled on his cookie for an hour before he finally finished it, I think he was savoring the taste. We didn't eat dinner and Mr. and Mrs. Stotch wished us goodnight before heading upstairs for bed. Butters had already fallen asleep clinging to my side. He was so sweet, his eyelid twitched giving the impression that he was dreaming, and his hair was all messy. He looked sloppy but, at the same time so clean. His skin was pale in the television's dim light and his hair appeared white. I switched off the TV and sat in the silence listening to the heater rattling in the hallway and Butters' soft breathing. I kissed him on the forehead before pulling the cover over us and closing my eyes. "Goodnight Butters," with that I dozed off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4: The Death of Eric Cartman

Chapter 4: The Death of Eric Cartman

Weeks went by and Eric was still in the hospital. Kenny and I visit him everyday after school hoping he would be better, but he's only gotten worse. He refuses to eat, and keeps himself awake until he passes out from exhaustion, and he has been put on suicide watch after another attempt while Kenny was visiting him. When I visit Eric by myself on Sundays he seems calm and at ease but, that can be easily be mixed up with how he is and how the medicine is. He has been living in the Psych ward for at least two months. He still gets his homework and lessons, and his mother visits him every single day, and makes his favorite foods, but he doesn't eat it. When Kenny and I see Mrs. Cartman she's not herself anymore she's emotionless, tired, devastated.

The hospital was dreary and empty. Doctors and nurses were rushed all over completing or failing their tasks of saving lives and/or filling prescriptions. Screeching of the hospital's wheelchairs and beeping of monitors filled our ears but, with just the two of us in the hallway waiting, it felt lonely. Eric was going through so much. He was under stress but, I didn't see it. He wouldn't be in the hospital if I was there to save him. If I was there to stop the thoughts before they ran through his head. But I wasn't and now he was living in a psych ward. It should be me in there. My eyes started to water up and I looked over next to me to see Kenny thinking hard about the same thing. He looked down at me with troubled eyes and took my hand into his lap. "Butters…" His voice was low and staggered. He was holding back tears. I've never seen him try so hard to hold back anything. I was afraid if he didn't cry soon his eyes were going to pop out of his head. "I-I'm sorry," "Ken?" "I-I should've known. I went through the same thing," I knew he was upset but, never has he blamed himself. "Aww Ken, it wasn't your fau-fault," "It is, I wasn't there for him but, he was there for me," he grabbed me and held me tightly against his chest taking deep breaths to hold the waterworks back but, when I wrapped my arms around him for comfort he let it all out. He sobbed into my shoulder. I was shocked but held him tight and cried with him. I didn't want to make him more upset by reminding him that it wasn't his fault so I remained silent. After awhile Kenny lied on the bench and rested his head in my lap and napped. We must've been there almost the entire day waiting for visiting hours. We've been spending our Saturdays like this ever since Eric was admitted. Kenny said he didn't want to enjoy himself until his best friend was signed out of the hospital. I believe I speak for all the guys when I say that we never knew how close Kenny McCormick and Eric Cartman were until now. Kenny and Eric always seemed to disagree and almost hate each other but, sitting with Kenny crying in my shoulder about Eric proved otherwise.

While Kenny was sleeping on the bench, Stan, Kyle, and Wendy came by to keep us comfort. Stan and Kyle woke Kenny up and they went off to the food court to get some dinner. I was following pursuit when Wendy pulled my shoulder gently for me to stay. "Butters?" "G-go ahead, Kenny I'll meet up with you," "Alright," Wendy walked me over to the bench to sit down and talk with me about something. I take it was serious from the look of her eyes. Her face was pink and puffy most likely from crying. "Hi Butters," "He-hey Wendy," "Do you know anything about Eric yet?" "He had a go-good day today," "What?" "I-It means that Er-Eric hasn't done anything to hurt any of the nurses or himse-self. He even ate a meal today from what I he-heard," "He hasn't been eating?" "I was so exhausted from crying that talking about Eric I felt like I had no more tears to cry out. "He-he hasn't been eating at all, and when he does he either throws it up or hits himself on the wall. Apparently Eric hasn't be-been eating anything for weeks, only alcohol," "Oh god," "Yeah it's pretty bad alright," "How do you think he'll react about me being here?" "We-well I don't know Wendy," "Alright, can I talk to," "Excuse me Butters?" "Yeah Dr. Hadley," "Eric is ready to see visitors now," "Oh, ok," The red-haired lady smiled a wide smile before walking away. "What were you saying Wendy?" "I uh, can I talk to Eric? Alone for a minute," "Well sure Wendy I'll g-go eat dinner with Ken," I thought it was kind of weird for Wendy to ask if she could talk to Eric alone. I mean I know she is a good person but, she hates Eric with a passion. But maybe I'm imagining things, I don't remember the last time I had a good night's sleep.

Cartman's Point Of View:

I need to get out of here. I need to leave now. I have tried everything. Everything is locked up, I'm locked up. I hate it here. I'm sick of everyone and the people who are taking care of me are people I barely know. My mother has never taken care of me and she still hasn't owned up to being a mom. When I was little she spoiled me with treats to compensate for her not being there. No dad, no siblings, no mom, I was an orphan living in a relative's house. No one cared. I thought I could get out of this shit town and make a living somewhere else but, my plan failed. I turned to the only other option I had left and it is still the only option. I just want to die. No one ever cared, and now out of nowhere they act like I'm of some importance to them. I know Butters cares, but he needs to forget someone like me.

The room was bare. Nothing covered the walls with empty graffiti. The walls were paper white, along with the ceiling. The tiled floor was a light shade of gray with dark specks across them, looking like the end of a paint splatter. I couldn't have a window, because I was on 'suicide watch'. I didn't have a mirror in the bathroom, so I had no idea what I looked like. I had no television, only a bed, a side table, and me and my thoughts. I felt abandoned in that room. Today was one of my 'good' days they said. I thought it was the worst. I was too exhausted to attempt anything so I lied in bed all day, alone. With nothing to do but think, all I thought about was how I will succeed next time. Today was different, I thought about a girl who would never like me. It didn't bring up my self-esteem or a decision change. I was going to succeed no matter what. That was one of the more recognizable traits of my personality. If I start something I had to finish it. I hated myself and loved myself for that and only that reason. Creek! I shot my head up from hanging low and saw a beautiful girl. A girl with prominence in her body and face that would make a model jealous. Her brown eyes glowed like cinnamon jewels. Her smooth raven hair was down below her waist moving in sync with her body swaying side to side. Her black boots contrasted well with her white jeans, and purple turtle neck with a small gold chain around her abdomen. He black trench coat draped over her on her sides with personality. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever laid my eyes on. I loved her ever since I could remember. She was perfect and her name was Wendy Testaburger. Yes, Wendy the chick who beat me up in 4th grade because, I let her. I couldn't hit her. She was in my room. She was visiting me in the hospital. She walked slowly towards the side of my bed and sat in the cushioned chair beside me and took my hand. I was confused. "Where were you?" What did she say? "What?" She seemed lost for minute, but she straightened her posture pursed her lips out and closed her eyes and repeated. "Where were you?" "Wendy what are you talking about?" "Dinner at Italio's, 7:30 don't be late. Yours only, asshole," I stared back at her speechless I didn't know what to say. I had forgotten all about that date. I wrote it on a little slip of notebook paper and slipped it in her locker on the first day of school. I didn't show. "I…" I didn't know what to say her eyes were pleading me for an answer of any kind. Her face was a soft pink from embarrassment but, she covered up well. She was always one of the strongest girls in the school, almost like she was one of the guys. She was brave, courageous, smart, and strong-minded. She was a strong young woman with beauty that I could not compare to anyone else. She was everything I hoped she would grow up to be. She had a disappointed expression on her face with a hint of pity. I didn't want her to pity me. I never wanted her to see me weak, not since our fight in elementary school. She caught me off guard when she took a deep breath. "I knew it was you. Bebe saw you at my locker and warned me of a death threat from you then I found this," She reached into her pocket and pulled out that same slip of paper that I wrote only for her. I didn't realize that I had accidently let one tear escape, until she jumped out her chair almost knocking it over and hugging me strongly. "Why Eric, why?" she held on to me. "What?" "Why would you leave me?" My eyes grew wide and my mouth was gaping like a fish, I lost my breath, I lost my train of thought, I couldn't do anything but, cry. I pulled her in closer whimpering into her shoulder. I had held in a lot for people, my emotions, my personal life, my problems, but with Wendy I felt like I could finally speak for the first time. She pulled away with her hands still on my shoulder gripping them, as if she'd never let go. "Eric," Her mascara had run down her face leaving little transparent black lines down her cheeks. I moved my hand up to her face and wiped away the lines, and put back a lock of her hair behind her ear and let out a few more water droplets. She smiled and leaned close to my face. She pursed her lips out in a friendly way, closed her eyes and leaned in further. I leaned towards her. Our lips caressed each other momentarily before attacking one another. Her tongue invaded my mouth, and mine invaded hers. I sat up without breaking contact and wrapped my arms around her torso pulling her closer towards me. We pulled away and looked at each other for reassurance that this wasn't a dream. She pushed me over to the other side of the bed and she lied beside me and snuggled up against me. Her head rested on the crook of my armpit, and I played with her hair. We didn't speak, we didn't have to. We knew what was going through our minds. What would people think? Will we be there for each other? Could we trust each other to tell one another secrets we dared never to share to anyone? We would have to find out for ourselves.

Creek! Wendy startled me by jumping from the noise, but she remained where she was rested against my side as Kenny, Stan, Kyle, and Butters walked in the room. "Well, you don't see this everyday," Kyle looked at me with shock. Kenny just sat where he usually sat in the red chair on the other side of my bed with Butters, and Stan sat in the chair where Wendy sat. "You look better Cartman," Stan meant sincerely as he gestured to me. "Yeah, you're a lot better from yesterday," Kenny said with a little joy in his voice. I looked at everybody for a minute observing each and every single person who had visited me whenever they could since I've been here. I wasn't alone. I started to cry so I sat up again and covered my face from embarrassment. "Woah, Cartman are you alright?" Kyle rushed over with everyone else to make sure I was alright. More tears sprang from my eyes like a faucet. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" I kept repeating myself. I didn't know what else to say to them. They meant so much to me. I shot up and pulled Kenny, Kyle, and Wendy into a huge hug. Stan and Butters came over and joined us in our emotional group hug. "I'm sorry guys, I'm so sorry. You guys have no idea how much you mean to me," I didn't want to let go, afraid of how they'd look at me. Wendy pulled me out of it and held me while everyone smiled at me. Butters and Kenny were both crying from joy, and Stan and Kyle were giddy with excitement. We all talked for awhile before people started leaving, Kenny and Butters were of course the last to leave. They would be back tomorrow and so would Wendy. I smiled at the thought. We talked about old times and how we should all go to the arcade in the mall one day when I get out of the hospital. Kyle and Stan came out to me and Wendy. Wendy already knew from school which I haven't been in since the first day. Days went by and I found out I would be discharged three days before homecoming. Enough time for me to find a suit and ask Wendy properly. Today was the best day of my life.

The day came when I could finally leave the hospital. All of my friends were there with my mom who drove us all to Bennigan's where Butters managed to get the employees to make a banner that said 'Welcome Home Eric' we had dinner and my mother and I dropped everyone home except for Kenny who was spending the night. On the drive home Kenny and I talked about how we use to be messed up kids, and now were just messed up teenagers. When we pulled up in the driveway I was a little nervous to walk in the door to see the mess we had left. Kenny held my hand and helped me make my way up the stairs and covered my eyes before going inside. "Kenny, what are you doing?" "It's a surprise," I heard my mother open the door and Kenny moved his hands. "Welcome home asshole," I opened my eyes to see a whole new house. There was new furniture new carpet, a new kitchen, and even new paint. I looked around in amazement. "And, wait until you see upstairs," He led me up to my room where he presented a new setting. The carpet was replaced with hardwood floors, the walls were now blue instead of purple, and a new bed was sitting in the middle of the room. "Kenny, how could you afford this? What about all the bills that were here?" "It's taken care of, calm down." "But, how?" "I think you should look under your bed," I looked at him with a confused expression as I worked my way around to look under the bed. There was a black shoe box with a bow on top. I lifted the lid to see a stack of visa, best buy, furniture warehouse, and other store gift cards. Each one was in a cardboard case with a name. "Bebe, Craig, Clyde, Kyle, Stan, Toke, Jimmy, Lola, they all bought these?" "Kyle, Stan, Butters, and I thought that life is going rough for you so, we talked to everyone we could think of and we got every person in the town to donate something to you and Mrs. Cartman," I started to tear up. "Don't cry on me now the paint, the floors that was from Randy. The furniture was from Bill at the furniture warehouse. Kyle was the one who used his allowance money to get you a laptop for school. He already downloaded all the programs you would need. Oh and his dad worked through all your bills and paid you off for the next six months. We helped your mom get two jobs at Tweek's Bros. Coffee and a check-out person at the grocery store. And we," "Thank you, for," I walked over and gave him a heartfelt hug.

I wasn't the only one who had a changed. My mother changed a lot too. She worked on getting off of alcohol and going to AA meetings, and she stopped her business. No more dead beat guys, no more abusive boyfriends, no more. I was proud of my mother, I gave her a huge hug and told her that I loved her and she told me she loved me too. I finally have a mom. She promised me that she would for now on be there when I need her, and will help me find a good college to go to. She told me that she was also proud of me for what I've done, and how far I have come from first being admitted to the hospital. All thanks to Kenny and Butters I finally have a future I can look forward too. Kenny and I went up to my room after my talk with mom and decided to call Butters and tell him how everything went. I thanked him for everything and Kenny told him that he'd spend the night over his house next week because, this week he was staying at my place just two friends hanging out for a week. And, since tomorrow was Wednesday I was going to school for the first time in a long time. We also had to look forward to Friday night's homecoming. I am going to ask Wendy tomorrow at school. After school, Kenny and I were planning to go with Stan to find suits because, Butters, Wendy, and Kyle would be dress shopping. I was actually excited to see Kyle in a dress, Butters I could see wearing one, but Kyle, I was never going to forget it. Kenny agreed with me on the Kyle subject. We planned to have corsages for the girls and would have my mother make them. She lost her way years ago but, she is still very artistic and creative nonetheless. We talked about how it would go and how we should enjoy it and decided to do something romantic. Stan had agreed to use his car to drive us all since we couldn't afford a limosene, so we discussed how we could make it. We were going to take strips of white Christmas lights and hang them on the ceiling of the car with streamers coming from the back of the car. On the back of the car we would put three hearts A blue one with K+K in the middle, a purple one with C+W in it and a green one with S+K in it, each representing the couples in the car. Of course we men are cheesy but, it impresses the girls. (And boys)

The rest of the night we played videogames and surfed through the web. We ordered pizza and enjoyed being kids for one night. "Hey Cartman," "Yeah," "You're different," I looked at him with confusion and fear. "Don't worry it's for the better. You're not mean, or rude, or even ignorant what happened?" We laughed before a silence took over the room. I thought for a moment and came up with the best answer I could muster up. "I killed myself," Kenny looked at me with an eyebrow raised. "What?" I thought it over one time but, stuck with it. "I killed myself, and created a new," I smiled at Kenny before turning around and continuing the game. Kenny patted me on the back before resuming the game also. My life finally had meaning. I am a good person.


	5. Chapter 5: Homecoming

Chapter 5: Homecoming

Kenny was sprawled across the couch snoring up a storm when I came down the stairs to make coffee. It was still dark out, but I had gotten used to waking up at 5:30 in the morning for my medicine. So this coffee was medicinal for me to wake up. I was tired but, my whole body was fully awake making it impossible for me to go back to sleep. I didn't want to go back to sleep, today was homecoming and Kenny, Stan, and I were going to the mall to get Kenny a new suit while Kyle, Butters, and Wendy all go dress shopping. But that wasn't for another five hours. After I had made coffee I went to go sit on the floor between Kenny and the TV and switched to channel 5 news.

Kyle's Point Of View:

Ugh, I hate mornings. I study way too much on school nights. I rolled over in my bed to see the clock read 7:36. I groaned and tried to go back to sleep when someone's arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me in a hug. I smiled because, I knew it was Stan thinking I was a teddy bear again. Knock knock! "Yea?" Stan started to wake up when I shouted to most likely my mother. "Bubbula you need to get ready for school," "Mom, I'm not going to school remember?" "Oh, well still get up, the sun's out and I have breakfast ready downstairs," "Ugh, ok," I heard her footsteps walk away before I rolled back to face Stan and kiss him on the nose. "Ugh, no" I chuckled at him as he talked in his half asleep persona. He was adorable when he slept. "Stan," "Meh," "Oh, Stan," "No I don't want too," "Stan we need to eat breakfast," he started to whine, as I got out the embrace and pulled the blanket off of him. "No, give it back," He sat up with tired eyes and a funny smile across his face. "No, we need to go eat, Mom made breakfast," He fell back onto the bed and patted beside him for me to come and lay with him. I shook my head with a smile and laid back down to cuddle with him. "Bubbula, come eat," Stan gave me a huge 'good morning' kiss before releasing me so that we both could get up and get some breakfast.

Butters' Point Of View:

"Good morning Mom and Dad!" They both looked up from their books to give me a smile before I headed out the door to Eric's house. Eric, Kenny, and I decided to go eat breakfast at the diner before heading to the mall to meet up with Wendy, Stan, and Kyle. Bebe might come too, but I am not sure. I drove to Eric's house listening to the sweet sound of the guitars playing as Chris Daughtry sang. I sang along like a happy idiot, but I didn't care. "Well I'm coming home, to the place where I belong!" I sang aloud until I pulled into the drive way and killed the engine.

I knocked on the door excitedly waiting to see Kenny. The door opened with Kenny and Eric ready to leave. Eric was wearing a brown hoodie, blue jeans, and combat boots. His hair was messy but, his face seemed clean-cut. Kenny looked messy and cute as usual with a black sweatshirt, worn jeans, and converse. During the ride, Kenny and I told Eric the gossip of school, who was with who, and who got detention. Eric seemed more thrilled than I was on the ride to the diner, nearly jumping out of his seat. "So Eric, do you have a-a tux?" He'll probably where a buisness looking suit like he always did. He leaned forward from the backseat and smiled. "I am planning on getting one today," "Oh, that's nice. Is Wendy going with you?" "Of course," he laughed and fell back to his seat. Kenny seemed pre-occupied looking out the window, he was tired, I could tell. "Ken?" "Yea Butters?" "A-are you ok?" "Yea, I'm just tired," With that we pulled into the diner's parking lot and headed inside for some breakfast. We sat at a window booth near the back with the guarantee of no one bothering us. A nice blonde haired lady came up to our table to take our order. "I'll have pancakes, eggs, and sausage with a side of bacon," "Cartman your diet is ridiculous, order a salad," "Fuck you Kenny," they both laughed while I ordered me and Kenny pancakes also. "Anything else?" "N-no thanks," she scribbled on her little note pad and walked away with content. "So Buttercup, what will you be wearing this fine evening?" "Oh Ken, I-I can't tell you it's a surprise," "Sounds like something special Kenny, better get the lube," I blushed ferociously from embarrassment. "Shut up Cartman, Butters and I aren't ready yet," "The perverted sex addict Kenny McCormick hasn't slept with little Butters yet, I'm impressed," "E-Eric now listen, I want to wait for the right time, Kenny is just wa-waiting for me," I didn't want Kenny to get a hint or anything but we've been together for three years, tonight will be the night.

After we finished our breakfast and tipped the waitress we headed over to the mall to meet up with the others. Along the way Kenny seemed distant again, something is bothering him. We raced down the road with the cool mountain air whipping across the sides of our faces listening to a collection of Van Halen and Led Zepplin. When we arrived Stan, Kyle, and Bebe were waiting for us by the fountain by the doors. Stan was wearing an Asking Alexandria shirt with a blue button up over it, with skinny jeans and boots. Kyle was wearing a more feminine outfit consisting of a green V-neck long sleeve shirt fitting his body, and dark jeans with a white belt. He had pink converse on with a rainbow drawn on the tip. "Damn Kyle, that was fast," Kenny and I looked to Eric who was grinning like an idiot. "Oh please, you're just jealous," Kyle smirked at Eric with a playful tone that we haven't seen between the two in a long time. "So Kenny and Eric will come with me, and you guys- girls will go your way," Stan said smoothly with a shyness but, happiness. "Sounds good to me," Eric said. "You guys go, we have to wait for Wendy," "Alright Bebe see ya," The boys went into the revolving doors not to be seen until three o'clock. "So Butters, Kyle do you have an idea of what dress you're getting?" "Well Stan is more into sexy, classy stuff so I would like to find a backless, neck strap dress, you know?" "Ooh, I think that will look adorable. What about you Butters?" "W-well Kenny doesn't really mind what I wear but, it needs to b-be extra special," "Oh, why so fancy?" "Well just between you guys, I think I'm ready," "Ready for what?" "To lose his virginity, Bebe. Butters here still is a virgin even after dating the biggest pervert for three years," "Oh wow, well we'll find something super sexy for you," I smiled at the two of them for helping me out. Soon Wendy showed up in a black skirt, pink sweater top, and black boots with her signature trench coat. She looked amazing anyday.

After going through Aeropostale, Hollister, and Forever 21 we finally went actual dress shopping. I had gotten a pair of black heels with a bow strap above the ankle, a new eye shadow pallette, and a simple black strap choker. We went into a store called 16 Dresses where we looked high and low for the perfect dress. "Ooh, what about this one?" Bebe asked Kyle. "No, too frilly," "Ho-how about this one Kyle?" I was holding up a dark silky green mermaid dress with sparkling white stones covering the strap meeting in the center of the V-neck. "It's perfect!" Kyle ran over grabbed the dress and ran into the dressing room to try it on. Bebe was looking through red dresses, her signature color, when she lifted up a short strapless dress that would go perfectly with her body. Wendy was helping me find a attention-getter dress, at first I wanted a pink dress but they seemed to childish so I began to look through the black dresses. "This one?" Wendy lifted a small simple strapless dress. "No too plain. I n-need something that can go over another outit," "Huh?" "I-I want to wear something cute and sexy underneath for after th-the dance," "Oh you mean lingerie?" Lingerie!" "Not for you Bebe, for little Butters," "Ooh kinky, we should stop at Spencer's for that," "Th-that dark shop across from Hot Topic?" Bebe nodded her head yes with a creepy grin on her face. We all began to giggle when Kyle stepped out from behind a curtain posing like a model, poorly. "How do I look?" "Gorgeous!" Bebe was the ultimate fangirl when it came to shopping and fashion. Wendy smiled and gave him a thumbs up. "Yo-you look great Kyle," "It's official! I'm getting it," we all giggled some more before Wendy caught off everyone off guard by screeching with excitement. "What!?" we all shouted. "I found it!" She referred to the short black dress with beautiful stones across the top with two slit on the sides. It was truly sexy. "Butters I think I may have found your dress," before I could say anything all three of them pushed me into the dressing room with the dress and told me to try it on. I put it on with ease and took a look in the mirror. I was stunning. I looked like something you'd see in a fashion magazine. I found the dress. Wendy found a long purple strapless dress with a thick black glittered belt across her stomach. We were done shopping.

We met up with the boys in the food court for lunch and made sure that no one looked into each other's bags. Kenny tried to peek a few times but, Bebe and I kept pushing him away. "Oh, we forgot!" "Forgot what Bebe?" "Kyle and Butters need to visit one last shop," We all looked at each other confused for a minute before kissing our boyfriends good bye to go visit this last shop. I think we were going to that sex shop called Spencer's. As soon as we stepped into the store Bebe pulled me over to lingerie while Wendy pulled Kyle to another part of the store. The wall was covered in every sex fantasy a person can come up with. Police man, fire fighter, prisoner, witch, lace, leather, and even rubber. "So, what are you looking for?" "W-well I don't know," "Hmm, well Kenny is exotic but, he needs to be put in his place first so," I had no idea what she was talking about, let alone what she meant by those words. "How about this?" She pulled down a lacey top with a matching thong. It was a black transparent outfit with little pink bows on the sides and straps. It was perfect for me. After my purchase we went over to Kyle where he was looking at sex toys. "Wow, extreme," "Oh hey Bebe me and Wendy were looking at whips, apparently Wendy and Eric are the perfect match," "Ho-how so?" "S and M," "No, really?" "Wh-what's S and M?" I looked to Bebe for an answer but, Wendy began talking before her. "S and M means Sadist and Masochist. It means that Eric likes to see and give pain for pleasure, and I like to recieve it," "So you li-like to be hurt?" "Yeah, so I'm looking for something that Eric will really appreciate," "W-well that seems a little t-too extreme for me but, cool," We all finished up our shopping and all went home to get ready for tonight. The girls and Kyle came back to my house to get ready while the boys went to Stan's house.

It was soon time to go to the dance and we all looked gorgeous. Bebe was wearing the short red dress from the store, with natural colored eye shadow, red lipstick, and her curly hair was put up into a bun. Wendy had her gorgeous strapless purple dress flow with her hips and her make up was simple, purple eyeshadow, black mascara and eye liner, and a tint of pink lip gloss. Kyle was in his elegant green gown with black and green eye shadow with clear lip gloss. I went into the bathroom to get ready so that the surprise will be more thrilling to me. I first put on the lingerie then the dress over it. I did dark smokey eye with hot red lip stick and my hair was moussed up into a faux hawk. I walked in to the room to get my shoes when both of the girls shouted with giddy, while Kyle looked in amazement. "Wow Butters?" Kyle seemed very surprised by me taking more of the sexy turn. The girls painted my nails black, and helped me with my shoes' straps. Kyle was wearing a pair of 3-inch black heels that revealed his earlier pedicure. My shoes showed my pedicure through the end with a strap that round my leg three times. We all looked stunning and we were looking forward to this night.

Ding dong! The boys are here! We all remained at the top of the steps while my mom opened the door to let the boys in. They all stood in front of the window waiting for their dates to descend down the stairs. First was Wendy, her dress matched Eric's white suit with a purple bow and black button up shirt. His hair was still messy but, he seemed handsome. Next was Bebe she came down stairs to meet Kevin Stoley who would've know! He was wearing a dark blue suit with a white shirt and a Star Trek pin on his suit. He always loved Star Trek even his bull hair cut matched Spock's. Then Kyle went down to a very handsome Stan wearing a white suit with a green shirt and black tie. Now it was my turn, I was nervous but, I did it. I closed my eyes as I descended down the stairs afraid to open them in fear that they won't like my outfit. When I finally did open my eyes Kenny was there in a black suit, black button up shirt and a pink tie. I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him in to a passionate kiss. "Alright, alright can we go now before the food is all gone?" we chuckled briefly before taking pictures and heading out to the car. We were taking Stan's car so there wasn't a lot of room, so I thought. When we stepped outside Kyle, me, and the girls all gasped at the decked out truck. They used Stan's dad's truck and covered the sides with white christmas lights. On the back was a hood cap and under their were blankets, pillows, and more lights on the ceiling of the cap. It was beautiful. On the back were four hearts, each with it's own pair of initials. It was the most romantic things I've ever seen. The boys all escorted us onto the truck before getting in the front and leaving for homecoming. If this is how amazing the boys are now, just imagine prom. On the way there we had ice cold coca-colas out of a cooler duct taped to the inside of the truck and chatted about everthing. This was going to be the best night ever.


	6. Chapter 6: A Dance, A Proposal, and

Chapter 6: A Dance, A Proposal, And The Worst Night Ever

We felt like royalty riding over to the dance, with the acception of the fact that we were riding in the back of a pick-up truck. It was beautiful beyond compare. When we arrived at the school cars were lined up in front of the school with couples stumbling out on there too long of pant or high heels. Every looked like we were walking into the Oscars. When we pulled up there was a long red carpet to the doors, with balloons lining down the sides. It was cheesy, something you would see out of a horrible romantic comedy. The boys all told us all to stay put while they got out to take us in. Kyle and Stan wanted to park the car and just walk up the carpet but, I insisted that Kenny and I park the car. I didn't want all of the attention anyhow. I was a nervous wreck; I was sweating so much I was afraid my make-up would begin to run.

After, Bebe and Kevin, Eric and Wendy, and Stan and Kyle made their trade marking appearance and strut down the carpet we pulled away to park in the parking lot. I had gotten out from the back and moved to the front with Kenny, only to see him more of a nervous wreck then me with shaky hands. I was afraid that if he didn't let go of the wheel we might crash from swerving. When Kenny pulled into a space and put the car into park he didn't kill the engine or make any move to get out instead he sat there and began to cry. "K-kenny?" he sniffled before turning to me smiling. "Ken, what's the matter?" He began to chuckle before shaking his head. "K-ken you're scaring me," "I-I am ashamed," ashamed? Ashamed of what? Oh no he wasn't ashamed of me was he? "Are you ashamed of me?" I was starting to pry before he grabbed and almost yelled, "No, no, no, it's not you Butters. I'm ashamed of myself," "Wh-why would you b-be ashamed of yourself?" "I'm ashamed because, I can't give you everything you want," He eased up and leaned back into the seat before speaking again. "I'm ashamed that I can't give you everything you've ever dreamed of. That I can't give you a big home, and all the diamonds in the world. I'm just a poor piece of shit," I couldn't believe what he was saying. "No, no Kenny you're perfect," He lifted his head with a confused expression. "I-I wouldn't be with you for more than three years, i-if I didn't believe you were p-perfect, I love you," "Th-then will you get out of the car please," "Huh?" He killed the engine and stepped out of the truck. He walked around the front and opened my door with a smile. "I'm sorry, I forgot, princesses don't open their own door," I blushed and smiled at him as he took my hand and led me out of the car. He walked me over to a big oak tree in front of the school. We could see the movie stars leave their mechanical carriages and make their way down the carpet. In front of the doors were our friends waiting for us. They looked everywhere until Eric saw us and lead the others over to us. "Hey, what are you guys doing?" Eric seemed concerned and looked to both of us for an answer, while the rest of them stood back with patience. "I-I need to ask B-Butters something," I swerved my head over to Kenny who was now stuttering and sweating like a football player after practice. "Well ask," "E-Eric stop it, Kenny needs time," I smiled proud of my response and looked back to Kenny. "Le-leopold St-stotch," as he was trying to make out my name he stooped down to one knee and reached into his pocket. "I don't kn-know anyone else wh-who make more happy th-then you," I wanted cry from happiness, and everyone observing was in shock while the girls gasped. He pulled out a little black box, when he opened it I saw a sparkling diamond ring. "It-it's real, I spent all of my money to buy a ca-car to buy this for yo-you," I began to cry and blush, "Butters wi-will you ma-marry me? I me-mean we would ha-have to wait un-until after we finish school an-and we would ha-have to," I bent over and gave him a huge kiss helping him off his knees crying. When we broke away I said the only answer I know. "Yes!" All of us began to smile, laugh, and group hugged before Kenny and I made our way down the carpet with Bebe taking pictures.

The dance was extravagant. White and black streamers hung from the ceiling, gold and black balloons rounded the room and white table cloths with lilies for center pieces scattered about the room. The dance floor was covered with teenagers dancing away at the horrible beat coming from the speakers. Our group has never been fond of the modern music. We danced, we sang, and we enjoyed spiked punch. "I have to use the bathroom Buttercup, I'll be back," "Ok," I said with a smile and went over to go sit with Kyle and Stan who were cuddling on a chair. "H-hey fellas," "Hey Butters, where's Ken?" "Well Stan he went to g-go use the bathroom," "Oh alright," It looked like Kyle was asleep on his shoulder, maybe he was. "I-is Kyle asleep?" "No I am not," "Oh it looked liked you were comfortable," He chuckled with tired eyes. "Where's Kenny?" "He went to g-go use the bath," Before I could finish my sentence I heard Kenny's voice over the speaker. We all turned to look at the stage and see Kenny giving a speech. "Hey everyone, I ju-ust wanted to say th-that Butters and I will be ge-getting married after next semester," He grinned his goofy smile as everyone applauded, hot and hollered, and whistled. People even came over and said congratulations. "An-and if you guys don't mi-mind I'd like to play our song," Everyone screamed out yeah, or go ahead. They all cleared the floor as the song Echo began to play. He made his way off the stage and to me grabbing my hand and asking, "Can I ha-ve this dance your majesty?" "Yes," If I smiled any wider I was afraid my cheek bones would pop out. He led me to the dance floor where we slow danced with everyone staring in amazement. Kenny was whispering romantic things into my ears. Others joined the floor and began to slow dance. "Buttercup, you look lovely tonight," "Thank you K-ken, you do too," I wanted to tell him then and there so I made the move of leaning his head so that his ear was beside my mouth. "I'm ready," "Ready for what?" "I-I'm ready, I even bo-bought li-lingerie," Kenny eyes opened wide as he pulled away and looked to me for reassurance. I nodded my head before taking his hand and leading him out of the room.

We told Stan on the way out that we were going to borrow his car and we drove to Stark's Pond. There we cuddled in the front seat staring out at the mirror called a pond. The moon shined bright in the cloudy sky with patches of little white dots that accented the scenery in front of us. We turned the engine off, but kept the battery running for heat. "Ken," "Yea?" "Pu-push the seat as far back as it c-can go," He had an odd expression but obeyed. After going as far back as the seat can go, I climbed over so that I was sitting on his lap. I leaned down and began to make out with him. Our tongues wrestling for dominance, my hands traveled down to unbutton Kenny's fly. He stopped me and held me. "What's th-the matter?" "We don't have, you know, lube," I smirked with cockiness as I reached down into my jacket and pulled out a small purple bottle. He looked at me with one eyebrow raised and smiled. "Impressive," "Courtesy of Sp-spencer's," We continued to make out and take off our clothes making our way to the back seat. I was now laying on the back seat while Kenny hovered over me. I slid his pants off as he unzipped the side of my dress. We took off our clothes and observed each other. "Nice panties," he teased. "Oh you're just j-jealous," He giggled and dove down to knick at my neck. He kissed his way up to my ear and bit my earlobe, gently pulling on it, grinding his teeth into it. While he was making me gasp from my neck to my ear, his hands had trailed down and under my lacey top and began to rub both of my hard nipples. Everywhere he touched felt like a switch on a control board to activate such pleasure. I began to moan when he lifted up and got the lube form the front seat. He put a little on his finger and circled around my entrance. "Are you sure?" I nodded with anxiety and excitement. I felt a digit slide in me slowly and painfully. After he slid one in he moved it in and out, waiting for me to relax. When I had relaxed he added the next finger, then the next. Soon he had four of his finger going in and out of me, I wanted him inside of me. I wanted him to be a part of me. "I'm ready," He acknowledge my words and put his other member against my hole. He very slowly and carefully pushed his erection in and waited for me to relax again. Once I relaxed he went in and out very slowly, it felt so amazing. It felt like I was floating in a dream of sensitivity and pure pleasure. He was going to slow. "Ken, ken fa-faster," "What?" "Faster!" I couldn't take it I needed it he pumped into me full speed filling me with a sensation I never wanted to forget. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his head into my neck. He began to nibble my neck again making me go over the edge. I arched my back and came all over his stomach. Not soon after did I cum, Kenny burst out a loud moan and arched into me spilling his seed into my rectum. He fell onto me after he pulled out and cuddled with me until we fell asleep.

Tap! Tap! I opened my eyes just in time to see Kenny being pulled out of the car and dragged off. "Kenny!" I ran out of the car it was dark out, I couldn't see a thing. He was gone, I panicking I didn't know what to do so I ran after him. After I ran at least 100 feet I turned and ran back to the car and called Eric. Ring, ring, "Hello?" "Eric! It's Butters we-we're at Stark's Po-pond Kenny's in tr-trouble," "What? What happened?" "Someone or so-something dr-dragged him out of th-the car and into the w-woods," "Alright Butters stay there we're coming," he hung up and I was still frantic. Who took Kenny? What do they want with him? I got back in the car locked the doors and window and began to cry. I sobbed until a car pulled up next to me. A black haired kid had dropped Eric and Wendy off. They ran over and I unlocked the door for them. "Butters what happened?" I was so embarrassed I forgot to put my clothes back on so I threw Kenny's T-shirt over my head and explained what happened. "I-I don't know me an-and Kenny were sle-sleeping when someone op-opened the door and dr-dragged Kenny off," I was weeping into Eric's shoulder as Wendy started to text someone. "Ok, Butters?" "Y-yea, Eric?" "Everything is going to be ok. Me and Wendy are going to look for Kenny you stay here ok?" "O-ok," He gave me a worried smile and a hug before they ran in the direction that Kenny was stolen too. I curled up into a little ball and rocked back and forth on the seat to try to calm my nerves before I put my clothes on. I thought I was alone when a pair of arms locked around me and pulled me out from the car and dragged me across the gravel. I kicked and screamed hoping for someone to come and save me. I cried and yelled out for help, but help never came. I guess my kidnapper was getting tired of dragging me. They slammed me on to the ground having my head bounce of a rock. I felt a warm sensation going down the back of my neck. I was bleeding. I looked up to see a black figure, I couldn't see their face. "Now you be quiet, or I will make you quiet," "O-ok," I closed my eyes and covered my ears afraid that he'd hit me. Instead he pinned my arms above my head and ripped my dress up. "Wh-what are yo-you doing?" "Shut up!" I began to cry even more. I was scared out of my mind. I didn't know what to do. "What d-do yo-you want?" "I said shut up!" I wanted to run away, I wanted to go far away from here and find Kenny. I wanted to be in Kenny's arms, and tell him how much he means to me. I needed him. The evil man pushed me down hard, and forced an erection into me without warning. I screamed, I screamed so loud, I hoped someone would hear me. "Shut up!" with that he hit me across the face. The side of my face started to swell and sting, I would imagine that it was beginning to turn red. The pain was unbearable, and it seemed to worsen each thrust. I kept whispering, "Please don't touch me, I'll be good," "Shut up!" Whack! Another sting on the other side of my face spread, giving me a headache. I wanted to die right then and there, just get it over with.

Cartman's Point Of View:

Wendy and I sprinted through the woods looking for a sign that Kenny was here. I was terrified about leaving Butters back at the car, alone. What if something happened to him also? I should've left Wendy with him. I stopped running and turned to Wendy who was looking at me with worried eyes. "Wendy go back to the car and check on Butters," "No, I want to stay with," "Now Wendy!" Without hesitation she ran back towards the car while I continued to look for Kenny. I yelled out his name calling for him. Why wasn't he answering? Can he not hear me? Is he hurt? I was starting to panic when I saw a glimpse of blonde hair. "Kenny!" I ran as fast as I could to him, calling his name until he answered. "Kenny!" "Ca-cartman?" I leaned beside him and held him in my arms. "Kenny what happened?" "I don't know, w-we were sl-sleeping when some g-guy took me away from Bu-butters," Kenny widened his eyes frightfully and jumped up. "Butters!" He took off in the direction of the car, calling out to Butters. I followed pursuit and hoped to see Butters at the car safe and sound. "Eric!" Wendy hollered out to us and was heading towards us. "Butters is gone!" "What!" Kenny started to shake in panic and sprinted to the car. When we got there the car door was wide open and Butters was gone. Kenny made his way around the car and saw streaking marks across the gravel. Something clicked in Kenny's head because as soon as he saw the tracks he took off again. As soon as Kenny ran off Kyle and Stan pulled in someone else's car. "What happened?" Stan slammed the car door and jogged over to Wendy and I. "We don't know I got a call from Butters saying that Kenny was in trouble so I came here and found him in the woods beat up. Then Kenny ran here to find Butters and now he's gone," "Where's Kenny?" "He ran that way," I pointed to the part of the woods that Kenny went through. Kyle was talking to Wendy about how they should call the police and find them as soon as possible, but Stan and I wanted to find them ourselves so we followed Kenny's trail.

It wasn't long before we saw Kenny running in one direction, but we heard crying from another. Stan and I decided to go see who was crying. Maybe it was Butters. We slowly crept around the trees, whose branches were trying to grab a hold of us. We snuck over the twigs and tried our best to avoid crunching the leaves. The air was bitter and we could hear the bats starting to hiss in the night. I was scared of what I might find. Would it be Butters? What had happened to him? Every step closer to the sound of weeping another beat faster my heart was taking. My heart was beating so hard and fast I was afraid I might have a heart attack. Stan went in front of me and led us to find little pools of blood on a rock and trailing to the edge of the pond. Blood droplets were dotted from the rock to a frozen path, where Butters was crying. Stan and I froze in fear. "Bu-butters?" "Aaaah! Please don't touch me! I-I'll be good, I swear!" Butters was so frightened, even our voices made him scream. We couldn't speak or move, it was like the universe was holding us back from helping him. We didn't know what to do. We both knew what had happened, we just couldn't believe it.

The wind was bitter and rough, tearing the sweet essence of air and her virginity. The pond was frozen and giving off a soft blue light from the full moon above us. The trees bare witness to the horrific scene before us. As a small boy with blonde hair, tear-filled blue eyes, and a beaten scrawny body lay on the frozen ground. An innocent naive little boy caught by the pure evil of man, was drowning in fear. His eyes were open with barely a blink, and his lips moving making a barely audible sound. He was whispering to himself, "Please don't touch me, I'll be good. Please don't touch me, I'll be good..." Stan stood there in shock, not knowing what to do. I don't blame him I stood there in disbelief, trying to wake myself up. Then Kenny woke me up with a frightful face, screaming at us, "What happened?!" Kenny sprinted towards Butters trying to steady his balance on the ice coated path. "Butters, Butters what happened!?" Butters slowly lifted his head up to Kenny and started to cry even more. Not once did he stop whispering. Silence took over as we had come to the horrible realization. Butters had been raped.


	7. Chapter 7: Oh My God They Killed Kenny!

Chapter 7: Oh My God They Killed Kenny!

It was devastating. The air was so thick, I couldn't speak. I was worried about choking if I so much as whispered. The walls were familiar from Eric's time in the hospital, and that was a feeling I was afraid of. Kyle and Stan tried to comfort me and get me to sit down, but I was furious. Who could do that to little Butters? What did he do to deserve that kind of punishment? I was going to kill who ever did this. I promised to Butters while he was sleeping that I was going to avenge him. I was going to get this sick son of the bitch if it was the last thing I do. "Ken?" I turned around to see Butters with his eye lids half way open, needles and I.V.'s pumping pain killers into my precious Buttercup. I paced over to the bed where I sat on a hospital chair and held Butters' hand. "I'm here, I'm here Butters," "Wh-where am I?" "You're at the hospital" Kyle answered for me knowing I was having a hard time talking. "Wh-why," before we could answer him his eyes grew wide, his hands began to shake, and he started to cry. He clenched his eyes shut before jumping out of the bed and tearing out the needles. "Butters!" "No!" "Butters!" "Don't touch me! I'll be good, I swear," he was terrified of us, why? He ripped out his I.V. and he began to bleed all over the floor. Kyle and I ran over trying to stop Butters from hurting himself and putting pressure where he was bleeding. Stan went to call for help in the hallway, we could hear him screaming, "Help! We need a doctor! Help!" Two doctors in white lab coats and a few nurses rushed in the room to sedate Butters and lay him down to rest for awhile. The nurse bandaged his arm, while the doctor tried to explain us the situation. "It appears that your friend Butters is showing signs of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder," I didn't want to hear anymore I ran out the door, through the hall, passed Mr. and Mrs. Stotch, and out of that hell. I went all the way home, I didn't stop. I didn't want to see the love of my life afraid. I didn't want to see him afraid of me.

Cartman's Point Of View:

I couldn't sleep. After we rushed Butters to the hospital and admitted him, I drove Wendy home and went home to my mother who was sitting on the couch waiting for me. "Eric?" "Mom?" "Honey, I'm sorry," She began to tear up and sniffle before making her way towards me with open arms. I hugged her and she held me tighter then ever before. "I'm sorry about your friend," I usually never tried to appear weak in front of my mother. I always had to be the grown up of the house, until now. I had a mother I could cry with, but I couldn't let the tears out. No matter how hard I tried to let myself cry, I couldn't cry with my own mother. Instead I began to laugh, my mother pulled away and looked at me worried. When I saw her eyes that hit a trigger and soon my laughter rapidly evolved to tears. We cried in eachother's arms on the couch as mother and son.

Butters was such an innocent soul, I have no clue who would hurt him. It kept me up all night. The thought of Butters being touched that way, it was making me sick. I was throwing up food I had eaten hours ago, the toilet was my best friend. My head rested against the wall behind me while my arms laid on top of the toilet seat. I wasn't leaving that spot, because I was afraid I would get sick in bed and wouldn't be able to make it to the bathroom. After my mother went to bed I started to come to the realization of what had happened. It seemed so unreal, so vague that it just couldn't be real. Atleast it shouldn't be real. Why Butters? Out of all the people this man could take, he took one of the most innocent ones. Why?

The next morning I was a mess, I had fallen asleep on the bathroom floor in my own vomit. My head was pounding and my eyes were tired from crying. I lifted myself up off the floor to get a shower and get dressed. I was going to skip school that day, I wanted to see Butters. After getting a hot shower, I put on my gray jeans, skinny puppy shirt, and converse before heading downstairs for something to eat, it must've been later in the morning because, my mom had left for work and I was alone. Ding dong! Huh? I walked over to the door and answered to see two police officers in uniform standing with a man who appeared to have been drinking. "Can I help you officers?" "Son, do you know this man?" I looked at the man again and recognized him as Kenny's dad. "Yea, he's my friend's dad, what's going on?" "Why! I didn't see him! He ran out in front of me!" the man started screaming and fell to the floor sobbing into my carpet. "I'm sorry about this," The officers lifted him up. "Wait wait, what is he talking about?" "Was your friend by any chance Kenny McCormick?" "Yea, why?" "I'm sorry, but last night he was hit by a drunk driver," The officer leaned his head toward the man signing that Kenny's dad had killed Kenny by accident. "I'm sorry son! I'm sorry!" The man started to sob again, before the officers took the man away.

I slammed the door and ran to the bathroom. No, this can't be real. This is a nightmare I can't get out of. I just want to leave, go somewhere where pain is non-existent. I just want to run away. I cried out his name and sobbed into my knees, I was curled up in a little ball next to the sink. This can't be happening, this can't be real. I need to tell Butters.

Butters Point Of View:

Why me? What did I do? I probably deserve it. I'm always getting in trouble. This is probably my punishment for all the times I've been grounded. Oh my god, what if he come back for me? Aww hamburgers! I started to sweat and shake. I looked to Kyle sitting on the chair, then he changed it was the man. Oh god, oh no! "No! Leave me alone!" "Butters! Butters, wake up!" "Leave me alone! I'll be good I swear!" He started shaking me and I opened my eyes to see Kyle and Stan hovering over me with worried eyes. "Fe-fellas?" "Butters, oh my god, are you ok?" "I-I, whe-where's Kenny?" The two boys in front of me lowered their heads and looked to me with sincerity in their eyes. "Fe-fellas, where's Kenny?" Stan walked to the window, while Kyle sat on the bed beside and took my hand. "Butters, Kenny, he, we can't find him." My eyes grew wide and I started to shake again. "Now, now Butters calm down," "Bu-but whe-where could he, he , he be!" "That's what we're trying to find out Butters!" "No, we need to, we need to," "You need to rest, we will find him," I started to cry as I laid back down on the bed. "Butters, I promise you we will find Kenny," "Yea, we all will help," Stan stood up and walked over to the bed when the door opened to reveal a large figure. "Butters?" "E-Eric?" "Yea, yea it's me," Eric walked over beside the bed and looked to the boys with worry in his eyes. "Guys, can I talk to Butters alone please?" "Sure" Stan and Kyle both nodded their head befores heading out the door leaving a silence that was unbearable. "Eric? What's the matter?" Eric sits where Kyle had just been sitting and took my hand, just as Kyle did. "Er-Eric I know Kenny's mi-missing but, we'll find him," "No Butters we won't."

Stan's Point Of View:

Kyle and I were sitting on a wooden bench next to Butter's room in silence. What was there to say? We still couldn't believe what was happening. We all felt unease about the whole situation. I mean this is Butters we're talking about how can a person do that. You hear about rape and murder on the news all the time and you think it will never happen in your town, but it did. An innocent boy was taken advantage of. A boy we grew up with since preschool, a kid that we have known for years. I pinched the bridge of my nose with my two fingers trying to make sense of it all when Kyle patted my shoulder for reassurance that it will be ok. "You alright Stan?" "Yea, I-I just can't believe it dude," "Yea, I know what you mean," "What do you think is going to happen?" "I honestly don't-" "No!" We whipped our heads up to see Butters running out of the room and down the hall with blood running from his elbow. "Oh my god! Butters!" Kyle and I ran as fast as we can to catch Butters, soon nurses and doctors were chasing him through the hallways. We thought he was going to to run out the front door until, a tall man caught him and pinned him down long enough for the nurses and doctors to patch him up and wheel him back to his room. The tall man smiled as he was wheeled away and looked to Kyle and I. "Your friend?" he pointed to Butters now being wheeled down the hall sedated. We nodded our head in unison. "Better keep a close eye on him, I would if I were you," with that the man left the building laughing. I didn't know what to say, I looked over to Kyle who had the same shocked expression. "What the hell is that suppose to mean?" "I have no idea," "Stan maybe, maybe he's the guy," What!" "Come on," We left the hospital and decided to follow the man. We would come back and check on Butters after we had figured out who he was and what he was doing.

We followed him for an hour into Denver, he was driving a black SUV with a blank license plate. We were surprised he wasn't pulled over yet. He had stopped at a beaten down house where he came out with a brown package in his hands. As he was getting into the car we realized that he had seen us so we sped off back towards South Park. What was in that package? "What do you think he was doing?" "I don't know dude, but whatever it is, it doesn't look good," we both went silent and drove home with nothing to say.

Eric's Point Of View:

I can't believe it. Any of this, I won't believe it. After I had told Butters what had happened he freakd out. He ripped the I.V. out of his arm and ran out the door. I was going to chase after him but, I saw Stan and Kyle go after him so I sat there and waited. When Butters was wheeled back into his room and placed on his bed all I could do was sit and wait. There was nothing I could do that would ease his pain. He had been violated, traumatized, and now the love of his life had passed away. I couldn't even begin to imagine what he was going through. I held on to a little stuffed frog with a hole on his arm close to my chest, wishing that time would go backwards, and he could save Butters before, the incident. I didn't know what to do or say. I was worthless, I was unecessary.

Kenny's Point Of View:

It happened sudden. I was on my way home when bright lights blinded me then I woke up in hell...again. I was getting tired of dieing I just wanted to live and if I died, I died. I said my goodbyes to Damien and Satan before leaving to return to Earth. When I did return I appeared a block away from Cartman's house, where I saw two police officers and my dad talking to Cartman. I knew what they were saying to him, that I was dead and that they were sorry, yeah whatever. They didn't care. When they left with my dad I ran over and jumped Cartman's fence and neared the back door when I overheard Cartman in the bathroom. He was crying, and screaming my name. I felt terrible. How could I just walk in the door and act like nothing happened? I decided to stay hidden from the guys and see Butters when no visitors were there. That way Butters would be at ease about me. When I was walking to the hospital covered head to toe, I saw Stan and Kyle speed off from the parking lot behind a black car, it was odd but I didn't think anything of it. I walked into the hospital and went to the front desk to ask for Butters. "I'm sorry he's sleeping right now," "Look ma'am this is important," "I understand but," "No you don't!" I calmed myself down to avoid anymore eyes staring at me. "Look he thinks I'm dead, and I'm not. I really, really need to see him," she looked at me questioningly before giving me permission to see him. "Thank you," I ran to his room with all my strength. I opened the door quietly trying to avoid waking up Butters. I closed it quietly and crept over to his bed and sat beside him when a hand covered my mouth while the other held my torso and pulled me into the bathroom. "Who are you?" it was Cartman. He was smothering me. I couldn't move or speak to tell him who I was. "Who are you, and what are you doing here?" I wiggled out and covered Cartman's mouth before unzipping my hood and revealing my face. Cartman's eyes grew wide as I put a finger to my lips signaling him to be quiet.

We sat in the bathroom for awhile just talking. I told him what had happened and Cartman started to remember again. He seemed to be the only one who would remember after I had died. He was also the only one who always cried everytime I had died. Butters remembered and cried after a few deaths. But, I usually would show up and no one remembers that I was gone besides these two. I don't know why. But after the trauma that Butters recently endured, and being told that I was dead. Will he remember? I was afraid for Butters. "Cartman?" "Yea?' He looked up at me with sorrowful eyes and a smirk that tried to cover up the devastation he felt. He didn't like being reminded that I couldn't die, it made him feel like he cried for nothing. "I-Is Butters alright? I mean like," "Like is he ok enough to see you?" "I don't want to see him," "What? Why?" I'm afraid I'll-I'll scare him," "What do you mean?" I looked to him with concern. He was sitting on the toilet with his arms on his knees, I was in the same position but I was sitting on a little stool that was next to the sink. We were sitting there for a good hour, we were surprised no nurses or doctors came to check up on Butters yet. "When he first woke up I held his hand to comfort him and he seemed ok but," "But he freaked out," "Yea," I relaxed my neck and allowed my head to fall into my hands with my elbows leaning on my knees. I was about to cry when Cartman interupted me. "Dude, I know it's hard but, I think you'd want to hear this," "What?" I looked up at him with determination in his expression now. "Butters freaked out again today, but it wasn't because of what happened," "Why did he freak out?" "He freaked out because, he thought you were dead," I let my head fall back down when I started to realize everything. I must've overreacted and ran out of the hospital and got hit by my own drunk dad and not realize that it would hurt Butters even more. I was such a jackass. "I think you should stay here and talk to Butters," "But what if-" "No, no what ifs, no buts, you need to stay here with him," "You know you've really matured Cartman?" "Psht, please don't give me that shit, I'm still me just not me," "You matured," "Yea whatever, I'm going to go down stairs and order me some lunch, you want anything?" "No, I'm good," "Alright" with that Cartman stood up and left the bathroom quietly and whispered to Butters to feel better.

I guess he didn't want me to hear or see because he tried to close the door and have his back facing towards me, but I could hear him still. He left the room with a small thud from the door before I got up and sat beside Butters watching him sleep. Even when he was going through such a terrible time he seemed at peace when he slept. His lips pursed out just a little, a pink tint that always ran across his face, and that messy poofball of hair covering his face. His eyes seemed tired but, content with the sleep. He was exhausted from the way he was curled up in his little fetal position with the blanket wrapped around him. I slowly crept my hand over on to his bed before lightly holding his hand in mine. I unconsciously squeezed his hand causing Butters to twitch and slowly open up his eyes. He looked at me with fear at first, and I started to pull away when he widened his eyes, jumped up and leaped into me. I wasn't ready for him to jump on me so we fell back on to the floor with a hard hit to my head...again. "Ken-Kenny? Is it re-really you?" "Yea, Butters it's really me," He wrapped his arms around my neck and squeezed me as tight as he could and started to cry into my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around his back and hug him just as tight. "It's alright Butters, I'm here" "I love you," And just like that it hit me, we had said it to each other over and over again but this time it hurt, because of how hard my heart started to beat just from hearin ghim say those three words again. "I wi-will love yo-you until the en-end Ke-ken!" He pulled from the hug and realized that he was straddling me on the ground. He started to blush before getting up and pulling me up with him. I was going to lead him to lie back down when he grabbed my collar and forced me up against the wall kissing me deeply. It was so sudden, so exotic, so new. When he pulled away I looked at him to make sure that he wasn't losing his mind. "Ke-ken I'm not t-too good with this kind of st-stuff but, I-I," You what?" "I want to sh-show you how mu-much I love y-you," "Butters, you don't have to show me how much you love me with sex, you've shown me already," "Re-really?" I laughed a little, "Yes, why else would I propose to you?" Butters stopped for a minute and looked me over and smiled. "I almost fo-forgot, we're eng-gaged!" he started to do a little giddy dance before giving me another deep kiss. This time when he pulled away he led me over to the bed where he snuggled up in the blankets and I behind him wrappin gmy arms around his waist and his hands wrapped around mine. "Ke-ken?" "Mhm?" "I-I," "What?" I started to grow concern when he stopped me. "Ken I'm gl-glad you were my fi-first," I smiled at the thought before I realized what he meant by that. And before I could start thinking about the situation I felt a little trickle. "Butters?" I lifted my head up just enough to see him crying. "Butters what's the matter?" he sniffled and cried a little more before starting to weep. He rolled over so that his face was against my chest and I could feel his tears running down my collar bone. "K-k-ken I can't st-stop seeing hi-him," It hit me. The person I loved the most was hurt by someone else. Some one had raped the love of my life, and they were not going to get away with it. "Butters I promise you, I'm going to catch this guy, even if it's the last thing I do," he sniffled again before whispering. "I-I'm afraid of hi-him coming ba-back for me," "That's not going to happen, I won't allow it, I don't care if that means having to glue my hip to yours and walking with you everywhere, you will not get hurt again I promise" he continued to cry in my arms before falling asleep from exhaustion. "Goodnight Butters," I watched him breath in his sleep and heard Cartman come in quietly and sit in the chair behind me."Kenny you asleep?" "No, what is it?" "I know who did it," I raised my eyebrow from confusion. "What?" "I know who did it," he said it with more emphasis and I knew that meant that he knew who did this to my buttercup. "Where does he live?" "Don't you even want to know what he is?" "No, I have something planned and you're going to help me," "Help you do what exactly?" "We're going to kill him," "Right just kick the shit out of him right?" "No, I mean kill him," "Kenny, that's a bit extre-" "He hurt Butters. He doesn't deserve to live after doing that to him," "Alright," "We'll talk about it tomorrow," "Alright I'll try to get more information on him."


	8. Chapter 8: Adam Carter

Chapter 8: Adam Carter

Days went by and Butters was starting to become himself again. He was starting to feel much better, he was talking and laughing with the others, and even started to cuddle with me again. We would visit him after school everyday, I would bring him his work, and he would tell me about his day. He was starting to get the cheerful glow he always wore naturally. I was excited for him.

The days also went by with Cartman and I staying up late in his basement. We came up with a plan that would make this man pay for what he did. We were going to kill him, the man that no one ever saw before. Adam Carter. 32 year old man with no family of any kind. He was a loser, a piece of shit. Arrested four times for assault, 3 for robbery, and 2 for sexual assault/harrassment. I hated him with every cell in my body. He lived in the south town of Denver, a shitty apartment with a low-income job as a grocery clerk. Cartman got the intel from the Denver police station, hosiptals, and the people around him. No one liked him, at all. He was the kind of guy that if he died, no one could care two shits. No family or friends to cry, and no one to say that he was a good man and should rest in peace, no one. The perfect target.

Cartman's basement was shrouded with boxes of his mom's "toys", old toys of his, and clothes that they didn't bother to throw away. In the corner of the room was a wooden table with metal fold-up chairs and a mini-fridge with beer and soda. We had an old living room light stand in the corner, and an old ripped up couch against the one side of the table. It wasn't a five-star setting, but it was comfortable and private. While most of his basement was covered in shit besides the sitting area for us, he a small patch cleared out with a few tables with flasks, glass beacons, and chemicals in coolers. I never really looked in to it until Cartman told me about it. He was a genius when it came to math and chemistry, I never understood why he had bad grade until he told me how he was trying to look cool. He was mostly interested in different poisons and chemical reactions with everyday polymers and medicines. He had equations written on the wall and small containers with the words "Dangerous, do not touch" on them. It scared me. I decided to ask him about it as he was leaned up against the wall with his chair in his jeans and black sweatshirt. He had a beer in his hand and smile on his face. The table we were sitting at was covered in maps, records, statements, and pictures of the perp we were going to kill. I was sitting on the couch with my arms leaned on the table.

"Hey Cartman," He looked over to me with his grin still glued to his face. "Yeah?" "What do you want to be when you grow up?" his smiled wipped away from his face without hesitation and he sat there thinking about it for a good few minutes. "You know what Kenny? I don't know," "Why not be a chemist or biologist, since you're into that kind of stuff," "Yeah I guess I could but, I don't know what if I'm not accepted in to a good enough college?" "Well you can still try, I mean if you take a few tests to switch your classes and be in a higher level," "How? How could I be in a higher level?" "Cartman you're smart, like a genius," "No I'm not," "Cartman, look over at you're little lab there you're making poisons and making equations that I've never even heard of before. I've seen you correct other peoples' answers in your notebook, people who are in Calculus or higher, your in Geometry!" He started to shuffle in his seat a little bit, I guess he didn't know that I knew. "Kenny, even if I do switch classes it's almost halfway into the year, a college is not going to look into a kid whose failed most of his life," "Unless you call them," "I don't even know what college to apply for," "Well first you need to find out what you want to be when you're older, do you want to get into science, math, history?" I want to, I want to be a-a," "A what?" "I want to be chemical engineer," "See there you go, now all you have to do is look for colleges that are known for that field and find a job," "If it's so easy then why don't you do it?" "Cartman I'm not saying it's easy for anybody, I'm saying it should be easy for you. I'm not doing it because I've already been accepted in to college." "What?" "I'm going to college for mechanical engineering. I know how to work on cars and motors but, I don't have the paper that says I do," "Kenny, that's, that's great!" "Yeah I know, I still haven't told Butters," "Well why not?" "Well because, I'm already saving up for our wedding. Butters' parents are paying for the dresses and tuxedos, and I'm paying for the cake and the fire hall. I had this all planned out before I even proposed, and after we get married I can go to college knowing that Butters' is still mine," Cartman smiled at me before starting to giggle. "Which brings me to my next question for you," Cartman stopped laughing and looked to Kenny with curiosity in his eyes. "Go on," "Will you be, will you be my best man?" he smiled wider than I have ever seen him smile before. "Of course I'll be your best man," we both started to laugh before looking to eachother and smiling.

We sat there and chatted about what our futures might be like until there was a growing silence. Cartman decided to break the silence by bring up what we were actually there for. "So what are we going to do about this asshole?" Cartman pointed to a picture of the guy walking down the street. "Something painful but, can go unnoticed," "Natural, painful, vengeful death. Fun," I looked to him and hinted towards the lab near us with my head. "Ken, I can make a variety of concauctions but, I need to know how painful," "What's the worst you have?" Cartman smiled devilishly before getting up and walking over to his little chemistry lab. He turned on a few small lamps surrounding the tables and pointed to all the chemicals he had to explain what they are. "This here is a mixture of bleach, unisom, and acid. The unisom will make him dizzy and tired, but the bleach will keep him awake while his body tries to throw it up. And, the acid will literally eat away at his flesh from the inside out. Now it's traceable but, not if we're careful," "What else do you have?" "Here is hydrogen cyanide, also known as the Jew exterminator in World War 2. It causes the victim to drool and experience excruciating pain because it is binding and choking off the iron in our blood cells. It takes awhile before the victim dies. Usually our bodies will flail and drool to escape the toxin but, usually fail," "Cartman have I veer told you that sometimes you scare me," "Yes, but that is not the point. Would you like to take a look at you're everyday poisons? I have hydrofluoric acid, batrchotoxin, arsenic, strychine," "No Cartman I'm good, I think we should stick with the hydrogen cyanide," "Alrighty then, now that we have the who to kill, where to kill, how to kill, and why to kill. We need to know when," "We need to figure out his schedule," "Already taken care of, come see," Cartman lead me back over to the table where he took a piece of paper out from underneath a folder. "His schedule is simple and repetitive. He meets with his parol officer every Friday at 4pm, he has work Monday through Thursday from 8am to 6pm, he's usually home after work all night and Sundays goes to a local bar called Skinny Dog at around 2pm and comes home at 7pm," "Wow, impressive," Thank you, now when?" "I don't know I still want to talk to Butters about this before we do it," "Why do you want to talk to Butters?" "Because maybe he wants revenge, if he wants to kill him then he should be a part of it," "Kenny, we're talking about Butters, what if something goes wrong? Also, if we kill this guy, we have to live with that the rest of our lives, do you want Butters to go through that?" I sighed because Cartman was right. I should still talk to him though, just to get his idea on the whole situation before I do anything. "I'm still going to talk to him about it, I want his idea on the whole thing before I do anything," "Alright just don't" "I won't tell him about our plans or anything," "Ok, good," We turned off the lights and went upstairs to play xbox for a little while before we ate dinner and went to bed. I was spending the night here almost every other day it felt. It felt like I lived there. I still stayed over my house a night or two out of the week to keep an eye on my sister Karen, but most of the time if I wasn't at my house or Cartman's I was with Butters in the hospital.

The next day I went to the hospital as soon as the school bell rang. I was excited to see Butters because today was the day that he was being discharged. It's been three weeks since he was admitted to the hospital and now, he could finally come home. I ran to the hospital with all the strength I had in me. I was like a dog chasing a cat covered in bacon, I just couldn't resist it. I burst into the hospital doors and ran to Butters' room. I haulted at his door and attempted to catch my breath before walking in to see my little Buttercup. When I could reasonably breathe I walked in with a smile on my face to see Butters in a cute little pink dress with worn gold studs over his torso. He had white knee high socks with little fabric frill at the top and wearing his pink converse shoes. He wasn't wearing make-up, except for a little lip gloss, and to top it all off he had a white bow in his fluffy hair. I smiled at him and opened my arms wide when he ran over and squeezed me tight. "Oh Ken! I-I can le-leave now!" "I know!" we kissed eachother before looking over at his mom and dad smiling at us. "Now Butters you and your fiance can go have the rest of the day together, we even brought your car for you," "R-really!?" "Yeah, now go on your mother and I need to go home and make ourselves some dinner," with that last remark Butters' dad pulled out his wallet and handed us 50$ with a grin before shooing us off. "Thanks D-dad!"

We left without a care in the world. When we got outside we looked allover the parking lot for Butters' car, but we couldn't find it. "K-kenny, do you see my car?" "No, I don't," "Hey!" we both turned around to see Butters' mom and dad standing in frnt of the hospital pointing at the pink cadillac to the far right. Butters was so giddy he ran over to his car screaming with excitement, he was like a kid on christmas. I walked over waving to Mr. and Mrs. Stotch before wrapping my arms around Butters as he was jumping up and down. "Butters calm down, you're going to mess up your hair," I giggled at the thought of messin gwith Butters' hair. "Oh Ken, it's s-so cute!" I kissed him on the cheek before walking over to the passenger door. We go in the car and drove off without a destination. "Well, where do you want to go Butters?" "I-I've missed driving m-my car, I-I don't know Ken, where do yo-you want to go?" "Where ever you go I go," "Alright Whistlin' Willie's it is," "Woah dude, Whistlin' Willie's?" "You do-don't want to go there?" "No, I'm just surprised, and excited, I haven't been there in a long time," "Oh, well now we're going," he started to giggle. I reached over the seat to get the album of CD's Butters owned and looked through to find a song that would suit us at the moment. Butters smiled and grabbed the album with one hand and zipped through and pulled out a black and red CD that read Butter's Mix on it. I've never seen the Cd before so I was curious as to what Butters was going to play he put in the CD and skipped to track 7. Now knowing Butters I thought he was going to play something like Stevie Nicks, Air Supply, Billy Joel, hell maybe even The Beatles but I was not expecting what was coming through the speakers. Shredding guitars and deep bass lines were filling the car more and more as Butters raised the volume. I had absolutely no idea that Butters listened to death metal. I raised my eyebrows and looked over to Butters who was singing and screaming the lines. "Rise, rebel, resist! Rise, rebel, resist..." "Butters?" "Rise, rebel, make a fist, resist!" "Butters!" Butters jumoed a little hearing his name, he turned the volume down a little bit and looked over to me red as a tomato. "Butters, are you listening to Otep?" he made a small laugh before smiling a childish grin before nodding his head. "I-I 've always like Otep, but from ti-time to time I listen to Slayer, Psy-psychlon 9, Overkill, when I-I'm in the mood of course," "And , may I ask what mood that is?" "I-I'm happy," he smiled at me. "Kenny, I thought you li-listened to this kind of music," "I do, but I was just surprised to hear that you listen to it also, I didn't know you liked that kind of music," "Yup, it's very rare when I listen to it though, most people don't like it so I don't play it," "If you like it then you shoudl listen to it, who cares what other people think, I like it too if that helps," "I-It does," he smiled and turned his head to the radio briefly before I got the hint and turned it to the highest volume. We both sang and screamed the lyrics since now it was the song Smash The Control Machine. "Smash the control machine, work, buy, consume die, smash the control machine!"

We parked in the front of Whistlin' Willie's that was closed and boarded up. "I'm sorry Butters," Butters turned around and looked at me with confusion. "What are you sorry for?" "We came here to eat and it's closed," he looked at me more confused. "No it's n-not," I was so confused now. Was he ok? Maybe he was really tired, and didn't know it. "What do you mean no, the sign in the window clearly says no trespassing, and all the windows and doors are boarded up," "Not all the doors and windows," with that Butters stepped out of the car and ran behind the building. I jumped out of the car and followed pursuit. I didn't know what Butters' was up to, but it scared me that he was out of my sight. I almost ran into a wooden post before Butters grabbed me and cuaght me off guard. I turned to him to see he was out of breath and grinning like an idiot. "Butters?" "Co-come on!" He took my hand and lead me to a broken door the whole place seemed dangerous, but Butters seemed like he knew what he was doing. "Bu-butters where are we going?" "You-ll s-see," We were swiping our hand across the atmosphere in front of us because of the cob webs. When we were through what looked like to be the kitchen we were in a small space. Butters stopped me where I was and looked up at me with those beautiful eyes. "Now Ke-ken you are going to st-stay here until I come ba-back," "Butters where are-" "No, st-stay here," He gave me a peck on the cheek before going through a doorway. It was dark, and the fact that it was almost dinner time didn't help either. Soon the sunlight would be gone. I heard a crack then saw an orange-yellow light glow from the other room, I was curious as to what Butters was doing. I wanted to take a quick peek before he came back but, I couldn't bring myself to break Butters' words. "Ok," I perked up hearing his voice as his footsteps drew closer to the doorway again. "Ok Ken now, cl-close your eyes," "What?" "You heard me cl-close them," I did what he said and closed my eyes and felt his hand grab mine and lead me through the doorway. The room smelled of mildew and vanilla, and a comforting warmth was coming from one end of the room. "Alright now, K-kenny you can o-open your eyes," I slowly opened my eyes to see a large blanket laid upon the floor and vanilla scented candles in front of an old claw machine full of toys. I laughed a little looking at the old machine it brought back good memories. "S-so Ken," I turned around to see Butters swaying back and forth with his hands behind his back. "How?" "I called my ol-old pal Dougie and as-asked him to set it up," "But why here?" "Well, I would've had dinner where w-we first really met but, yo-you wouldn't be that excited about going t-to an arcade," "I wouldn't have cared, as long as I was with you," "Y-yeah but this is a special night, and I-I have been counting down the days and today is not only the day I-I got out of the hospital but al-also the da-day I fell in lo-love with you," he smiled and made his way toward me with his cute little walk. He wrapped his arms around my neck and started to sway I placed my hands on his hips and swayed with him happily.

We danced, laughed, and cuddled in front of the candles enjoying eachother's company. We skipped dinner and just talked about how we used to be when we were younger. How Butters is still Butters, Cartman isn't an asshole anymore, and how everything changed for the better. Butters was laying his head on my lap when he jumped up and startled me. "Butters what's wrong?" "I almost fo-forgot!" "Forgot what?" "St-stay here," he skipped quickly over to what used to be the bathrooms and told me to stay looking the other way. After a few moments I was starting to worry so I went to turn around to see Butters crawling over to me, he was only a few inches away from me, and I smiled at him. He slowly lifted himself up and strutted in front of me and stopped where I could see him best. My breath was taken away literally. He had taken his converse off and his dress to reveal a black laced corset and panties now buckled to his thigh highs. He brushed his hands form his ankles slowly up his hair and messed it up. "Bu-butters?" "Who'd you th-think I am?" "Wh-wh-what are you doing?" "I have a li-little present for you K-ken," I leaned back with interest and watched as Butters danced for me. He spun, he shook, and he moved his body with expertise. He fell to the ground dramatically and crawled over me and began to make-out with me, causing my member to stiffen faster.

My hands started to creat a mind of their own when they traced Butters' figure and grabbed a hold of his moaned from the impact and started to undress me. He first unzipped my jacket slowly, and tore off the sleeves and pulling my shirt over my head fiercely exposing my naked torso. He started to nip at my collar bone as my hand slowly started to untie his corset.I moaned in pleasure when he nibbled on my left nipple and began to unzip my jeans. At this point his corset was open his panties were sliding off and we were two of the happiest people alive. Butters got up and ran over to his dress and reached into his dress' pocket and pulled out a small bottle of lube. He ran back over here in fear of ruining the moment and open the could tell that we were hungry for each other as we made out intensely. My pants were off and his black lace underwear was to his ankles. Butters took the lube and pumped me making me harden even more and coating me. When he was down covering me he lifted himself off of me and put his own finger in his entrance moaning with pleasure. This was making me so hot. I just wanted to attack him. When he was finished stretching he squated over me seducing me with his gorgeous fire lit eyes and dove in for another kiss. As our tongues wrestled for dominance he startled me by pushing my member in all the way. I gasped from surprise. "A-are you al-alright?" "Ye-yeah I'm fine, just sur-surprised," "Oh, alright," he made out with me more and pushed me to the ground with a thud. He danced on me, with me inside him. He broke the kiss and sat up and moved his hips in circles causing me to lose my breath. He felt so good, so alive. He moaned and yelled in pleasure and dove down to nip at my neck again causing me to arch my back, wrap my arms around him and pull him in close as we both came together. He lied on top of me for a few minutes before pulling me out and cuddling beside me. I was out of breath, it was so amazing. "That...was...amazing!" "Yo-you ...said it K-ken," I turned my head to look into those eyes again, full of love, admiration, excitement, I truly loved this boy with all my heart. "Butters," "Yea?" "If something were to ever happenor if something were happening I want you to know that I would die for you, hell I will die for you if it were to save you even from an ounce of sadness," Butters gave me a kiss and started to cry then laugh. "I want t-to marry yo-you Kenny M-McCormick," I started to cry with him and gave him another heart felt kiss. This was truly the best night of my life.


End file.
